


Mauled

by harrypanther



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Hiccstrid - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-09
Updated: 2017-04-09
Packaged: 2018-10-16 23:49:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 39,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10582020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/harrypanther/pseuds/harrypanther
Summary: Set during RTTE series 4: What if the Riders had arrived rather later they did in the episode 'Midnight Scrum'? Finally rescued, Hiccup is more affected by his ordeals than he lets on-but as he changes. can his friends help him return to the person they knew?A/N: A few of these around but honestly, Midnight Scrum was just such an opportunity to explore all sorts of emotions and psychological sequelae from what happened. And since the writers were good enough to start with a scrum, a few more Rugby terms may accidentally slip in.Disclaimer: I don't own How To train Your Dragon. Rights remain with Cressida Cowell and Dreamworks.





	1. Turnover

**One: Turnover**

Hiccup Haddock was definitely not trembling. He certainly was not afraid as he lay, curled on his side, wrapped tightly in ropes so he could not move and barely breathe. He wasn't lying shivering and scared in the hold of Ryker's ship as they sailed inexorably towards the Hunters' base and Viggo. It had to be the cold in the dank space that had him shivering, his shoulders hunched in a vain attempt to keep himself warm. And he was only lying curled up because he had been dragged from pillar to post, knocked out and dragged off by Berthel and Amos, grabbed by Savage, briefly rescued by Throk and then just as quickly snatched by the masked Viking before being handed over like a prize sheep to Ryker. And in the process he had been punched, fallen, tied up, kicked, had a chain slung around his throat which had been used to haul him along and had finally had Ryker punch him unconscious.

And he wasn't, under any circumstances, being taken to the Hunters so Viggo could kill the Dragon Rider himself.

He took a shuddering breath. His stupid pride-and, of course, his desire not to upset his father when he was leading the celebrations for Berk's four hundredth anniversary-had meant he was vulnerable and unprotected. He could have listened to Astrid, he could have explained to Stoick-though he was still astonished his father hadn't chewed him a new one for losing Berk's gold-and he certainly could have not wandered alone through the night time village on his way home but of course, he had known best and ignored the advice of the best warrior he knew. And him knowing best had landed him here, trussed up like a yak for the spit, waiting to face Viggo for the very last time.

He blinked. His throat was horribly painful, his voice a broken croak when he had tried to sass Ryker and he was curled because his middle felt like it had been crushed by the punch. Breathing hurt, lying there hurt-everything hurt.

And the fact he would never see Berk-or his father, friends, Toothless or Astrid-again hurt most of all.

He gave a slight gasp of pain as he tried to change position and ease the pressure on his already-numb arm. He hadn't given up, breaking free numerous times, running, fighting for his freedom-but the sad fact was that every single time, every person who had grabbed him had been stronger and more skilled than he was. They had all kicked his ass. His very best efforts, struggling for his life-had been useless.

The door to the hold slammed open and three hunters erupted in, somehow imagining he had managed to break free again and was waiting to ambush them. Even though his metal leg was missing, lost on that last island where the masked viking had been doubled-crossed by Ryker and Hiccup had made the choice to untie the rope around his leg and let the man drop to his death. His hand had been slipping and it had been a choice that Astrid, Snotlout or his father wouldn't have hesitated to make-but for Hiccup, it had been a watershed moment. And the vision of the man dropping away, the detached prosthetic grasped in his hand, still flashed across his vision. That was something else they had done to him: though he was certain that he and Toothless had caused deaths during the wars with the Outcasts and Berserkers, he had never killed a man one on one. He had never looked into a man's eyes as he died at Hiccup's hand-but the Hunters taken away that innocence as well.

Hands snatched his matted hair and he was dragged brutally to his foot, swaying and hissing in pain, unable to straighten up. His middle really was excruciating and breathing was sharply painful.

"Thanks…for the hand…" he croaked, wincing as rough hands locked on his shoulders and he was more or less dragged through the door and up a low stair, into an office. He gritted his teeth and looked up-to meet Ryker's cruel brown gaze. The big Hunter nodded and Hiccup was slammed brutally into a chair, facing the Hunter as bravely as he could.

"In a few hours, we'll be at Base-and then Viggo can finally kill you," Ryker gloated, his eyes inspecting the bowed shape in front of him. "But before then, I owe you for some of the trouble you have caused me…and of course, there are still some questions I need to ask you about your little base…and Berk's defences…" Hiccup stared at him.

"You…really think I'm gonna tell you anything when you're going to kill me anyway?" he croaked incredulously, his green eyes narrowing contemptuously. "They're coming for me, Ryker, So whether you do whatever you want…or lock me back up-you aren't escaping." He leaned closer. "Stoick the Vast will kill you."

He had expected Ryker to laugh but the man's deep chuckle just stiffened his resolve. He wasn't going to give him one second of satisfaction. The big man rose and drew his huge jagged knife-and Hiccup couldn't help but flinch, grit his teeth and turn away, expecting to feel the blade plunge into his body. But the pain erupted from his scalp instead as the man wrenched his head back, almost lifting him from the chair as the knife slid under the hem of his tunic, slicing brutally upwards through the fabric and his carefully tooled leather armour all the way to his neck. Ryker leaned closer, the tip of the blade sliding delicately over the trembling skin and digging slightly into the soft flesh under his chin. He could feel the man's foul breath on his skin as Ryker leaned close.

"I'm going to enjoy breaking you," he breathed, the tip of the knife sliding back down over the young Berkian's heaving chest, tracing the contours of his lean body. The knife grazed the waistband of his leggings. "And you will break, Hiccup. All I need to do is deliver you alive to my brother. And he won't care what I do to you on this journey, as long as you are conscious to feel the sword slide into your heart!"

Staring into the face that promised no mercy, no hope, nothing but swift and brutal pain, degradation and torture, Hiccup swallowed what saliva he had left to moisten his agonising throat.

"I won't break," he said roughly. "Do your worst." Ryker twisted the knife against his stomach and cut downwards into his skin.

"I will," he breathed.

oOo

The dragon riders were skimming low over the sea, flying as fast as they could in a group, led by Toothless, carrying Stoick and Astrid on Stormfly. The Chief had a face that would terrify a charging dragon and the group was quiet, the worry for their friend palpable. They had located the two ruffians who had kidnapped Hiccup from Berk and Savage, who had given up the location of the handover on Sleipnir Island. Throk had admitted he had been overcome by the masked Viking and everyone had been even more concerned.

"Why didn't he tell me about the bounty?" Stoick groaned and then froze. "It was what I said to him, wasn't it?" Astrid looked over her shoulder to the Chief and heard the guilt in his voice. It had been obvious when they had returned to Berk that the Chief was still furious at his son for losing Berk's gold and condemning them to poverty and hardship. Not that Hiccup didn't already blame himself but he had prepared himself to be publicly castigated for his failure and her friend hadn't wanted to admit any further failure to his Chief. Hiccup took every responsibility insanely seriously and even now, there was a part of him that was still that scrawny fifteen year old who would do anything, no matter how insane or dangerous to win his father's approval. When Stoick had said 'the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few', Hiccup had taken it as a message that the celebration was far more important than anything he could say. And he wouldn't listen to any amount of discussion that Astrid had pointedly had with him. He was as stubborn as the Chief himself.

"You know Hiccup," she sighed. "Sometimes his pride is bigger than his brain."

Toothless crooned worriedly. On the island, they had found a few scattered Hunter weapons, a discarded chain and-strangely enough-Hiccup's prosthetic leg, abandoned on the top of a cliff-but no sign of the missing Rider. So Heather had led them in the direction of the Hunters' main base and they had been flying for some time, worrying about the prisoner. Was Hiccup even alive or had he been already killed? Had Viggo gotten his hands on their friend? Or was there still hope?

"Hunter ships up ahead!" Fishlegs called, his normally gentle voice hard. The twins had stopped bickering and talking about the bounty that had placed on themselves, both stern-faced and ready for battle. And Heather was as grim as Astrid had ever seen her. She hefted her axe in her hands and soared up, seeing two Hunter ships, the larger one probably the older Grimborn's vessel.

"Heather, Snotlout-take the left," she called. "Twins, Fishlegs-you're on the right. The Chief and I will go through the centre!" She glanced over to Stoick but he nodded: the Riders were a well-oiled team of which he wasn't a part and he would usually allow Hiccup to lead them. It was clear that Astrid was well-qualified and accepted as his substitute in his absence. "Keep them distracted! We'll get Hiccup!"

With a roar, they dived down and attacked.

Dragon root arrows and dragon-proof chains shot up at them but they were much more experienced than they had been when they first met Ryker and every dragon avoided the missiles, a variety of blasts of flame, lava and plasma hammering the two ships viciously. The twins were whooping, gas coiling around the larger ship and temporarily masking the descent of Toothless and Stormfly as they sped down and landed hard. The Chief and Astrid leapt down, weapons readied and the dragons followed at their backs, batting away any Hunters foolish enough to try to stop them as the Zippleback gas finally exploded, knocking half of the Hunters off the ship. Then Stoick lunged forward and grabbed the nearest Hunter, lifting him easily off the deck.

"Where is my son?" the Chief roared, his axe raised. The man whimpered a little, his eyes trailing towards the door at the end of the passage. Astrid nodded as the Chief threw the man aside, not even watching him slam against the wall and slide down unconscious as they headed for the door. Blue eyes flicked up for askance of her Chief-and Stoick nodded, kicking the door in.

Astrid erupted in, seeing Ryker look up from his desk where he was bending forward towards a long, pale shape that was sagging pretty much unconscious from a chair. Ropes were tying the prisoner in place, his auburn head bowed forward. There was blood smeared over the pale skin, bruises black across his midriff, his chest and his neck with fresher welts on his face and cuts across his chest and torso. The big Hunter looked up, a bloody knife in his hand.

"Get away from my son!" Stoick roared and threw himself at Ryker as an explosion jolted the whole cabin sideways. Astrid steadied herself and scrambled forward, delicately using her axe to slice through the ropes and then she caught the limp shape that toppled into her arms.

"Hiccup?" she whispered. "Are you okay?" And she groaned inwardly. Looking at the battered state of him, 'okay' was about the furthest thing from an accurate description of his condition. But his bruised face twitched and his horribly bruised throat worked.

"A-Astrid?" he whispered brokenly. "You-you came…" Her heart broke a little at his tone: it was almost as if he had given up, had accepted his doomed fate at the hands of the Grimborns. But everyone had said Hiccup had fought at every stage of his captivity. She rested a hand on his face.

"Yeah, it's me," she said with forced levity. "We need to get you out of here." He nodded.

"Please," he murmured as she hauled him onto his foot: his leg almost buckled. Behind them, Stoick lifted Ryker by the neck.

"You put a bounty on one of us, you put a bounty on ALL of us," the Chief snarled. "And you get all of us. Take this message to Viggo. Stay away from my son-or I will kill you!" And then he punched the man, the impact crashing his unconscious shape onto the floor of the cabin. Then Stoick turned-to see the sagging shape of his son. All thoughts of Ryker dismissed, he moved urgently to Hiccup's side, catching the naked shoulders, grimacing at the abuse the young man had endured. The thick bruises across his throat in the shape of the links of the chain they had found sent his blood boiling and the Chief leaned close to his boy.

"Hiccup?" he murmured. Hiccup forced a weary smile onto his battered features.

"Hey, Dad," he mumbled. "Sorry I messed up the celebration…"

"Son…why didn't you tell me-about the bounty…?" Stoick whispered in a stricken voice.

"Needs of many…outweigh needs of few…" Hiccup repeated wearily. "I understand, Dad…"

"No," Stoick began. "That wasn't what I…"

Hiccup jerked, his eyes wide and mouth snapping open in a soundless cry of agony. His body arched and Astrid saw a knife protruding from the back of his chest. Ryker gave a nasty sneer then dived through the window of the cabin and into the water below. Hiccup folded.

"HICCUP!" the Chief cried, his eyes horrified. He swept the collapsing shape into his arms as Astrid rose, her axe gripped tight in her hands as they turned to the door.

"TOOTHLESS!" Astrid shouted, her eyes seeing Hiccup's frightened and pained emerald gaze flutter closed. "Sir-we have to get him back to Berk-now!" Grimly, the Chief clutched his only child against his body and ran for the dragons.

They had Hiccup back-but at what cost?


	2. Penalty

**Two: Penalty.**

Gothi had shooed everyone out of Hiccup's room as she set to work saving his life, his father and Gobber in attendance-though the blacksmith's deliberate propensity for misinterpreting her runes earned him a series of blows from her staff to an ever-expanding repertoire of expletives. Toothless had insisted on being there too, curled in the corner of Hiccup's room, big green eyes sad and worried. Stoick sighed, watching the old woman rip the knife out with surprising strength to a scream of pain from Hiccup and holding the trembling shape tenderly. Hiccup's face buried into his father's muscular shoulder as the Chief tightened his grip on the young man.

"She says the knife hit the bone and didn't damage his heart and lungs," Gobber read as the Elder packed the wound with a paste that slowed the loss of blood and prevented infection. "But he's got damage to the muscles and they will need to heal."

"Thank Thor," Stoick murmured, his worried eyes flicking to the Night Fury. Toothless's ears were back and he was looking cowed: Stoick was struck by the way he could understand that a dragon was blaming himself that his rider had been taken. Hiccup curled against Stoick and stiffened as the old woman poked his wound hard. A muffled cry sounded against the Chief's armour and Stoick felt him tremble again. Instinctively, Stoick stroked the matted auburn hair, feeling his son bury his head deeper as Gothi bandaged his wound before nodding and turning her attention to his other injuries. The Chief stared into the bruised, tight face and sighed as he cautiously laid the boy down.

"Hiccup," he began but the bleary emerald eyes opened, definite brows furrowing as he struggled to speak. His throat was swollen with black bruising and he winced as he tried to swallow.

"I'm…fine…Dad…" he rasped stubbornly before closing his eyes once more. Stoick stared into his bruised face and gently stroked his hair.

"Okay, son," he said, not fooled. Gothi glanced up and made a shooing motion and the Chief, with a sigh, retreated. Even Gothi didn't want to move the Night Fury as she continued to treat the boy-but both of them could see that Hiccup was suffering. Gobber hung back until Gothi gestured for him to go as well, leaving her with the battered young man. Once the limping sounds had retreated, she quietly stroked Hiccup's bruised face and the green eyes opened slightly.

"Am I going to die?" he whispered. She squinted at him and gave a slight smile, wagging her finger. "That…doesn't fill me…with confidence," he mumbled thickly. Gothi winked and began to slather ointment over his bruised chest and middle and neck and tenderly stroke a mushy cream into the vicious cuts deliberately sliced into his skin. He hissed and twitched until she finished and forced him to drink a cup of a bitter-tasting liquid that he knew was designed to help with the pain. But he closed his eyes in relief when she finished winding the last bandages around his battered shape and he was able to curl up. Gothi rested a hand gently on his forehead before shuffling out, as Toothless gave a sad little warble. Hiccup lifted a hand, stretching slightly towards the Night Fury and Toothless eagerly scrambled up, butting his nose against the outstretched hand.

"Wasn't your fault, bud," he breathed his voice almost beyond using now. Toothless nuzzled his forgivingly, his eyes fixed on the curled young man. "I was too stupid to listen…Astrid tried to warn me…" Gently, the Night Fury rested his head against Hiccup's battered middle and quietly, Hiccup wrapped his arms around the dragon.

"I'm never leaving you again," he whispered and finally dropped asleep.

oOo

The Riders remained outside the Chief's house for a while until Gobber, Gothi and finally Stoick emerged and shooed them away. Only Astrid remained, her face determined.

"Can I see him, sir?" she asked respectfully but he shook his head.

"He's badly wounded and Gothi says he will need peace and rest to heal and regain his strength," he said gravely.

"He will recover?" Astrid checked, her voice determined. The Chief looked into the wide blue eyes and wondered for the thousandth time how Hiccup had managed to become friends with this fierce and serious young woman who was the epitome of everything a Viking maiden should be. He nodded.

"He's going to need your support, lass," he admitted. "Not only because someone who has been through the ordeal he has-been hunted like an animal and handed from hunter to hunter, helpless-will have a lot to deal with but also because I rely on your to stop him going out of Toothless before he's ready." She frowned for the briefest of moments.

"You may need to remove his leg to stop him flying," she advised him.

"I'll remember that," Stoick managed with a small twinkle in his eye though he read the worry in her expression. "Come back in the morning, lass. He's sleeping now…"

"What if he wakes and needs anything?" she asked a little desperately. "I would hate for him to wake and find that he was alone. He would think we had abandoned him. He-he's been through enough…" Stoick patted her on the shoulder.

"Toothless will fetch me if he needs anything," he said reassuringly and strode off up the hill towards the Great Hall. He needed to discuss the bounty with the Council-those of them that had finally sobered up after the celebrations… But as she watched him go, the young Viking's gaze trailed back to the house and she sighed. She would wait a while-and then she would sneak in and see him anyway. Because after the last day, Astrid knew she wouldn't be able to sleep unless she saw him for herself.

oOo

It seemed he had barely fallen asleep when he found the images whirling around him, horrific memories from his very busy day rerunning constantly…

_…being snatched from behind as he walked down the village to head back to the Chief's House, a foul hand pressed across his face and the unbreakable grasp locked around his chest and pinning his arms. And worse…he could feel the prickle of two hooks digging hard through even through the supple leather of his tunic. He had thrashed and struggled until the hooks had dug agonisingly into his flesh and he had jerked in pain. Finally, as they dragged him through the silence of night-time Berk, the hand had been taken from his face but before he could cry out, a fist slashed across his face and he slumped, unconscious…_

_…being grabbed by Savage at the moment when his heart had soared with hope that the others had found him, the flicker of fear at the man's cruel expression suppressed as he had done everything he could to try to escape…the man's fist punching his gut and crushing the wind from him before he was trussed like a baby yak. And the satisfaction as he had tripped the former Outcast and made a break for it. Even diving over the side had seemed a better option than being at the mercy of the man who hated him. Hiccup hadn't told the others how Savage had treated back when he had been captured by Alvin, how Savage's treatment hadn't been restricted to just words. There were scars on his body he had never shown anyone that were courtesy of the Outcast, that he had never shown anyone, least of all his father. And when Savage had grabbed him and torn his prosthetic leg off, he had lain there helpless-hands bound and down a leg: he was literally at Savage's mercy…_

_…and then Throk, taking down Savage and standing over Hiccup, a knife raised. And Hiccup had flinched, closing his eyes and expecting the blade to stab into his body. He knew that the man didn't approve of Hiccup, that he always looked at Hiccup as if he was a personal insult to Throk's existence. Throk-as many of the Defenders of the Wing-considered Hiccup's beliefs and especially his Riding of a dragon as heresy, no matter that Mala had accepted him as a friend. Hiccup had seen the sideways look and heard the reservation and the edge of dislike on Throk's voice and drawn his own conclusions. And he could not express the relief he felt as the man had helped him up, having cut him free…until he had been ambushed by the masked Viking…_

_…waking in the man's hold, an increasingly familiar sensation. Trying to get any information from the stranger and being rewarded with silence. Trying to escape and feeling the chain snap tight around his throat, choking his breath and holding him helpless. The man leaning over him, menacing…and tugging hard on the chain, the pressure agonising, making him feel so much like a dog on a chain, not a proud Viking. And being handed over and traded like a piece of livestock, then making a break for it-again-as Ryker double-crossed the bounty hunter…_

_…rolling over the cliff edge, his hands desperately scrabbling for the rock…but sliding as the man who had captured him grabbed his metal leg and demanded to be pulled up. And he had thought about it-Thor, he had. Because Hiccup was a decent man, he was someone who had nearly killed himself saving others, over and over…but today, he had only himself to rely on…_

_…and he knew this man would not repay his generosity with gratitude. He knew the man would just recapture him and haul him along to Viggo Grimborn for the Hunter to kill him in person. Hiccup's campaign against Viggo had been too persistent, too effective to ignore. And in that moment, as he felt his fingers slide over the gritty surface, he had made the decision, his hand pulling the rope free and unfastening the prosthetic, then kicking the metal away and seeing the man fall away, shame and disgust at himself curling in his chest…_

_…and then there was Ryker…_

He began to whimper and thrash, shaking his head and clutching at his battered middle. Tears squeezed from his eyes, which were screwed shut. And his mouth worked as he tried to speak, though only a pained, hoarse whisper escaped.

"No…please…" he whispered. "Ryker…NO!"

Toothless scrambled to his feet, his head nudging Hiccup gently, trying to wake him, but the young man was too lost in his hideous nightmare. Toothless could smell the fear radiating off his beloved brother in waves, hear the shudder of his sibs and hear his heart galloping fit to burst. And he could smell blood as his violent reaction tugged on his barely-scabbed stab wound. He looked up but Hiccup screamed again and the Night Fury gave a pathetic croon of fear and despair. He couldn't leave Hiccup like this…but his friend needed help. Why wasn't his father or his almost-and-should-be-in-the-future-mate here?

"NO! RYKER-PLEASE! DON'T!"

A thump sounded and Astrid dusted herself down, having scrambled through the window the moment she heard his cries. Stoick was still with the Council and she knew leaving Hiccup was a bad move.

"I'm here, Toothless," she assured the agitated dragon. 'Go get Gothi. I'll look after him until you get back." The dragon gave a grateful warble and dashed for the stairs, his half-tail whisking as he vanished from sight, leaving the beautiful Shield Maiden with the thrashing Hiccup. So she did the only thing she could: she sat beside him and wrapped her arms around him.

He stiffened and his eyes snapped wide.

"Please…" he breathed, eyes moving wildly, acting as if she was another of the men who had kidnapped him. She shook her head and sighed.

"Shh, shh," she said gently. "It's me, Hiccup." She moved an arm to stroke his cheek, feeling the skin clammy under her gentle touch. "You're safe…"

He suddenly stopped struggling and relaxed against her, so she feared he was unconscious but his head moved slightly against her shoulder and she felt him briefly nuzzle against her.

"…sorry…" he mumbled, his voice barely a breath.

"For what, dummy?" she asked him gently, still stroking his hair. He took a shuddering breath.

"Being so weak. Not listening. Getting captured." The tone was ashamed but she gently stroked his cheek and his shadowed green eyes lifted to meet hers.

"Hiccup, I expect nothing less," she said gently. "You're Hiccup. You never listen. Trouble follows you around. But you always get away…" He shuddered.

"H-hurts," he mumbled and she peered at his bandages, seeing at the fresh stain of red on the bandages over the knife wound. Without hesitation, she pressed her hand over the wound, fingers splayed over the material and palm feeling the damp sensation of the blood.

"Toothless is fetching Gothi," she reassured him. He swallowed.

"Ruined the celebration," he mumbled. "Lost the gold. Had to be rescued. Really am useless…" She hugged him harder.

"No, you're Hiccup," she told him softly. "You're brilliant and brave and our leader. You're my best friend. We've got you back. That's all that matters." He leaned harder against her.

"Don't deserve it," he mumbled. She held him close.

"I'm here for you, Hiccup," she murmured softly. And then she whispered the words he had said to her when she had been so sick with the Scourge of Odin. "I can't imagine a world without you." But he stiffened.

"It would be better," he breathed.

oOo

Astrid and the rest of the Riders visited daily and he endured the twins' ridiculous ongoing envy of his personal bounty and Snotlout's comments with as much grace as he could-but somehow, the jibes from his cousin hit home just a little more as he sniggered at how easily Hiccup was caught. Astrid's constant glares at Snot didn't help because his mind kept rolling over what she had said-and what she hadn't and his convictions about what was wrong with him grew and grew.

 _She didn't contradict me,_ he sighed, his gaze trailing over the blonde girl as she punched Snotlout in the gut. _She didn't say I wasn't weak. Because I am. I know I'm smart and sassy and inventive-but every single one of those men outfought me and every one of them beat me up and trussed me up and hauled me wherever they wanted. I tried and I just wasn't good enough. Thor, even Savage managed to get the better of me-and he was so pathetic both Alvin and Dagur despised him…_

The twins crashed to the floor, rolling around and trading punches. He flinched as he shifted when the bed was sideswiped by the struggling Thorstons and he tried to cover it with an attempt to shift his position. Astrid looked up with a slightly smug expression and her hand briefly touched his, her eyes checking he was okay. She must have seen me, he realised with shame. Gods, I really am a disappointment.

"You okay?" she whispered and he nodded, though he was lying.

"Never better," he whispered hoarsely. _Never show weakness. Always put on a brave face, son._ He blinked as he recalled his father's words, shortly after lost his leg. _The tribe looks to you to give them confidence. They need a strong leader._

 _But I'm not,_ he thought, his eyes trailing over the others. Fishlegs was sitting at the back with Heather, talking quietly. The husky boy had quietly spoken to Hiccup back on the Edge, revealing his feelings for Heather and Hiccup had suggested that Fishlegs spoke to the girl about how he felt, wisely advising him to do what he had never managed to get the courage to do for himself. And now-how could he? Astrid saw him as weak, as a liability. She had needed to rescue him again and now, he was injured and was keeping them from the Edge, stuck on Berk while he recovered.

As if reading his thought, Heather's green eyes flicked up and she offered a small smile. "How are you?" she asked, her tone concerned. Hiccup had comforted her when she had lost her brother and the very thought made him almost cringe with shame.

 _Another time, I didn't listen,_ he admitted to himself, mentally kicking himself harder. _I was so stubborn that I knew best-no matter than someone who actually was allied with and worked with Viggo and knew how he planned his ambushes, told me otherwise. And because he thought he owed me-and he couldn't bear my leading his sister to her death-he went ahead…and it cost him his life. I cost him his life. My stupid pride, my overconfidence, my weakness. Dagur was a hero. He was strong…except maybe in the head but hey, he was deranged, after all. And I let him down. He saved my life twice and I let him down._

"I'm fine," he managed painfully and she smiled, nodding.

"I wouldn't want to lose you, Hiccup," she said gently as Fishlegs patted her arm and she smiled to him. Hiccup grimaced.

 _Captured by Dagur and the hunters. Captured by the Hunters while looking for Dagur. Outsmarted by Viggo, over and over. In the end, is there anything I can do?_ he thought despondently. _And I've condemned Berk to poverty and hardship because I thought we could fool Viggo at the auction and avenge Dagur. I had to be saved by Dad then._

He stared at his friends.

 _I'm too weak, too soft to protect them-and it led to this,_ he thought quietly, feeling a flash of pain as he took a deep breath. _So I have to change. I can't carry on like this. If I want to be the Viking that they need and Berk needs…I can't be this Hiccup any more._

His gaze locked on Astrid and he forced a smile onto his bruised lips, being rewarded by her beautiful grin in return. He didn't deserve her. He didn't deserve any of them.

_I have to become something else._


	3. Reset

**3: Reset**

"AGAIN!" Hiccup snapped, panting hard, sweat trailing over his flushed face. Astrid backed up, also breathing hard, her axe raised.

"You're exhausted," she argued. He growled and lunged at her, forcing her to defend herself urgently as his sword clanged over and over against the blade of her axe.

"You don't get stronger by resting!" he growled at her. His voice still wasn't back to normal but the moment he had been allowed from the house he had gone flying on Toothless-and then started practising with the sword. She could read the pain from his half-healed wounds in the shadows under his eyes but he refused to listen to any protests and had pushed himself harder than any of them. Astrid backed away, seeing him lunge again before spinning and slamming him back with her axe. She was astonishingly strong for a woman and she could match him for strength-but he was stronger than his lean shape suggested, from years hanging onto a Night Fury in a thousand crazy stunts and working in a forge. But she could see that certain movements hurt him and because she cared for him, she wouldn't cause him pain. So she went easy on him-and that just seemed to anger him. He threw his sword down.

"You have to fight me!" he shouted at her and she blinked, lowering her axe.

"Excuse me?" she asked, her eyes narrowing. He glared at her.

"You don't have to treat me like some pathetic loser!" he snarled.

"Ha! As if!" Snotlout said too loudly and Hiccup turned on him furiously. He marched up to the shorter, stockier young man, his blazing emerald gaze boring into the shocked face.

"You have something to say, Snotlout?" he growled, the fading bruises across his throat moving as he breathed hard. Snotlout paused-and then his eyes narrowed in unjustified superiority.

"Yeah," he said unwisely. "I mean, would a proper Viking warrior be so easily captured by five different people?" Hiccup stiffened and glared.

"Get out of my sight," he hissed. "I'm sending you back to the Edge!"

"Hey," Snotlout protested. "I want to spend some time with my family and…"

"Back. To. The. Edge!" Hiccup roared and Snotlout backed up, his eyes shocked and drifting to his fellow riders for support. Astrid stared across them, reading uncertainty and hurt. And fear, she realised. This wasn't their friend, the Hiccup they knew. So she lowered her axe and walked calmly towards him.

"Hiccup?" she began but he turned on her.

"When I ask to spar, I expected you to take it seriously!" he accused her sharply. "I know I need to improve-or I will remain a liability…"

"You're not a liability," she assured him but he took an abrupt step towards her and she found herself almost backing up a pace. _When did he get so intimidating?_ she asked herself.

"Now who's lying?" he sneered. "I need honesty off you, Astrid. And I need your help." She nodded.

"You know-I would do anything," she assured him, her expression gentler. He closed his eyes for a second.

"Take them all back to the Edge," he said firmly. "Check the defences and make sure all the watch towers are in good order. I don't want the Hunters to wreck our base while we're here." She looked into his face, the bruises fading but still obvious and the thick collar of bruising across his throat still purple and hard.

"Are you sure?" she asked him gently but his face fell into a scowl.

"Why-you think I can't make my own mind up?" he asked her sarcastically. But it wasn't his normal good-humoured sarcasm: this was bitter and pointed directly at her. And she found herself wilting a little under his scornful glare.

"Well, of course not, but I-I thought…" she murmured, taken aback. He stared at her for a long moment, then turned away.

"I know my own mind, Astrid, and when I give an order, I expect it to be obeyed," he told her coldly. She stiffened and she was sure he heard her angry breath.

"Yes, sir," she growled and spun away, her furious steps rapidly receding. He turned back to stare at her, almost on the verge of calling out to her-but he caught himself and watched the other Riders look at him, then slink off, a range of disappointed disapproving or just disgusted looks shooting at him. He was breathing hard as he watched the last one disappear-and only then did he bend forward, his hand rising to clutch his left shoulder. The wound from the knife was still far too fresh and Gothi had told him that he shouldn't be using his left arm for anything-which he had studiously ignored. He couldn't use an axe or a mace with any conviction anyway-but did have some skill with a sword-especially his Inferno sword, which Heather had found on the island where he had been handed over to Ryker. But it hadn't spared him one second of his ordeals-so it clearly wasn't good enough.

"Far be it from me to make any comment," a familiar voice boomed from the entrance, causing Hiccup to flinch and turn with a muted hiss of pain. Stoick entered, his face thoughtful and eyes inspecting the lean and still battered shape of his son.

"But you will anyway," Hiccup muttered, not quite under his breath. Giving no sign he had heard, the big Chief stopped by his son, staring down into the bruised face. Hiccup just reached his shoulder and was about a quarter of his father's width but he was fully his equal in bone-headed stubbornness-as Stoick had previously found to his cost.

"Your friends are an odd group," the Chief pointed out thoughtfully, watching Hiccup's reactions and his rebellious green eyes. His hand had dropped away from his painful shoulder the moment he heard his father's voice and Stoick had sighed: that was an astonishingly Hiccup reaction. The boy never admitted to anything, no matter how ill or hurt he was, which made Stoick's job as a father infinitely harder. "And they certainly don't respond like normal Vikings…"

"Which is why we keep getting our asses kicked!" Hiccup told him bitterly. "They don't follow orders, they mess around when I need them on point and they would rather lie in the hot springs than run patrols."

"Who wouldn't?" Stoick commented. "But my point is-they follow you by consent, son. You aren't a general or a Chief. They are your friends. And they work…in a way."

"Not well enough!" Hiccup argued. "And we haven't stopped the Hunters and Viggo! Instead, they keep winning!"

"Son-you did enough for him to want to remove you…permanently," he pointed out and Hiccup's brows dipped in a scowl.

"I lost Berk's gold!" he argued. "I let Dagur get killed…"

"Son…" Stoick's face dropped in shock: this wasn't something he had heard of before. He knew the two men had a difficult and complicated relationship, that Hiccup both hated and pitied Dagur, that he had been tormented by Dagur as a child and had visited the Berserker in his captivity on Outcast Island. And he had told Stoick that Dagur had let Heather go and saved her life because she was his sister-even though she hated Dagur. But he hadn't told his father that Dagur had died…and saving the Riders, by the sound of it. Hiccup shook his head.

"And they took me without much resistance!" he said angrily. "But I can't let that happen again. I have to be more ruthless-more like you. I need to learn how to fight. I need you help me with the sword-and Spitelout as well." The Chief pulled a face. His half-brother wasn't the sharpest axe in the armoury and was an abysmal instructor-but he did have some weapons skills and wouldn't deliberately kill Hiccup.

"Son-just be careful," he counselled. "You are nowhere near healed-and if you do too much, you will permanently disable yourself."

"What, you mean more?" Hiccup asked sarcastically. "Can't have a son with half a leg and a gimpy arm, eh, Dad?" Stoick stared into his face.

"Hiccup, make sure what you are doing is for the right reasons," the Chief told him quietly. "I understand you are shaken by your ordeal. I can appreciate you want to make yourself stronger so no one can take you as easily again. I recognise your need to become a more efficient and effective leader. I realise you want to make Viggo fear you and turn the tide of defeats." His voice dropped. "Just make sure this isn't just about revenge."

Hiccup's eyes narrowed. " _Really_ , Dad? You try that line on _me_?" he scoffed. "What about all those searches for the Nest?" Stoick scowled at him.

"I was seeking to stop the raids and protect my people," he said stiffly.

"So am I," Hiccup replied shortly, reaching down and retrieving his sword. He looked up-into a deeply cynical expression. "Just tell me none of those searches that cost so many lives and ships was about revenge, Dad-and I'll go back to being the weak, useless, pathetic son who got dragged off by half a dozen bounty hunters…" Stoick looked appalled-and deeply guilty. "Precisely what I thought!" he said snarkily. Then he stared into his father's eyes. "So will you help me, Dad?"

Stoick nodded dumbly.

"I will always do everything I can for you, son," he breathed. Hiccup tossed him a sword.

"Then let's get started!" he said.

oOo

"Great Beyond," Snotlout grumbled as they approached the Edge after a long flight. "What's so great about it? We left here expecting to see Stoick kick Hiccup's ass over losing the gold and having a laugh about that bounty…"

"Yeah-and no one has even tried to capture us," Tuff grumbled.

"And we were offering twice the reward than for Hiccup-and our picture was far better!" Ruff added.

"And instead he turns into Captain Tyrant and sends us back while he has a nice cosy recuperation back on Berk!" Snotlout completed. Astrid rolled her eyes as Hookfang huffed and growled.

"Guys-he was badly beaten up and knifed by Ryker," she reminded them. "He's not allowed to fly back yet." She scowled at the rebellious trio. "But for the record, he's right! We shouldn't leave the Edge undefended for so long."

"But Smidvarg and the gang…" Tuff began.

"Tuffnut-they don't really keep guard that well ever since you had them playing 'statues' the moment they perch on the lookout posts!" Heather pointed out.

"It's fun," Ruff argued. "I mean you can throw anything at them-and they don't move at all!"

"And they're really not much use as lookouts if they don't react to anything, let alone a threat!" Fishlegs added.

"Again, it's fun," Tuff argued. "The chicken was very amused…"

"Enough!" Astrid growled. "When we get back, we'll need to check the base, run a perimeter patrol and make any repairs…"

"Aww, Astrid, babe-you don't wanna do that," Snotlout whined. "After all this stress, with Captain Tyrant and the long flight, we'll need to rest and…"

"Snotlout, for the millionth and final time, I am NOT your babe," the blonde growled. "Now, what I actually wanna do is axe several parts of Snotlout off so there will be no more Snotlouts-ever…" She paused and stole a glance at the suddenly pale Jorgensen. "But I may decide not to do what I want if you all do what I suggest! Agreed?"

"Agreed," came the rebellious mumbles. Astrid soared up, patting Stormfly's neck as Heather pulled Windshear alongside.

"Is he okay?" the raven-haired girl asked, not referring to Snotlout. Astrid sighed.

"I don't know," she admitted slowly. "He seems harder, angrier than I have ever seen him. He won't be back for a couple of weeks-so maybe he'll have worked through it during that time?" Heather's expression was anything but reassuring.

"You know Hiccup better than I do," she replied after a moment. "But we both know how stubborn he is. And if he gets his mind set on something, he never gives up." Astrid gave a small smile.

"Like that ridiculous DragonFly of his," he added. Heather frowned. "His gliding suit." She rolled her eyes.

"You never told me when he developed it," she said and Astrid smiled.

"Then prepare to be astonished by the tale of how the smartest man on Berk kept jumping off a cliff…and plunging to his doom…" she began.

oOo

Gobber was worried when he found Hiccup had pulled his third all-nighter in a row, because he knew his sometime apprentice and friend was capable of incredible obsession and stubbornness-even when he desperately needed his rest. But Hiccup had merely smiled, his gaunt, ashen face focussed on the armour he was making. And Gods help him, it was like nothing the boy had ever made before. Gobber had liked Hiccup's armour, the beautiful woven tunic and personalised epaulettes, every detail perfect, functional but beautiful. Yet what he was making was functional and very much more menacing.

Hiccup stared at his new armour. He still had the remains of his old and he could just have repaired it-but it wasn't what he needed any more. He needed to be stronger-and he needed armour that would protect him from knives and fists, that would help him. He couldn't just be the boy in the red tunic any more. So he had stained the leather black and created a thick cuirass to cover his torso which he had reinforced with a fine mesh of Gronckle iron. Large black leather pauldrons were marked with the stylised Night Fury he had decorated on his old armour and studded for extra protection. Vambraces and rerebraces of black leather fitted with buckles were designed to protect his arms and he had made cuisses for his upper legs, the right holding a sheath for Inferno while the left had a sheath for a dagger. Finally, he had made himself a Gronckle-iron reinforced gorget to prevent anyone crushing his throat as that masked Viking had done. Pausing, his hand tenderly drifted over the still hard swelling and he grimaced. His voice was recovering but he could still feel the tug on the chain, hauling him along like a beast. His brows dipped in a scowl.

_Never again._

"That's mighty smart armour," Gobber commented. "Looks heavy…" Green eyes flicked up in annoyance as he trailed his hand over the material he had prepared for the last item in his new armour. He lifted a hammer to start hammering studs into the leather.

"Are you suggesting I'm not strong enough to wear it?" he asked sharply but Gobber shook his head, completely oblivious to the irritation in his tone or the flicker of uncertainty.

"It looks pretty bulky-so it may get in yer way when yer flying that lizard o' yours," Gobber commented, ambling into the forge and carelessly turning parts of the armour over with no regard for any order Hiccup had his things in. "And doesn't look too easy to run in." He eyed his assistant up. "Yer pretty agile, Hiccup. This will take that away."

The hammer hit the surface hard as he dropped it. "Isn't that what everyone wants?" Hiccup asked sarcastically. "To stop being all of…this?" He gestured to himself and frowned. Gobber looked genuinely surprised.

"Mebbe when yer was that scrawny boy-before ye met Toothless," he pointed out. "But once ye saved the island, Hiccup, we recognised that we needed more of…this…" He gestured to the defensive shape standing before him. Hiccup scowled.

"I don't," he argued. "So far, all it's done has led me to being captured over and over, to losing over and over, to failing over and over!" Gobber stared at the young man, his face twisted in a scowl. "I've lost DragonEye, I've lost Berk's gold, I've lost Dagur! And then…I lost me! It's not good enough!"

"But what have ye gained, laddie?" Gobber asked, shocked. "Ye gained Toothless, yer friends, Astrid, adventure, respect…" Suddenly, Hiccup turned away, staring at the work bench.

"Not enough," he sighed, for a moment sounding like himself. "I can't keep failing Dad. I can't keep needing rescuing and causing harm to Berk. I can't be the man who ruined Berk!"

"And what about ruining you?" Gobber asked him softly. He gave a grim smile and moved his left leg slightly, the metal clicking softly.

"Hey-you know how much I am willing to give if needed," he murmured. "Don't worry about me, old man. I'll be okay." Then he turned back to his work. But Gobber watched him work, seeing him flinch a little as he hammered studs into place to fix the pieces of leather together. Gothi had tackled the blacksmith to try to speak to Hiccup but Gobber knew that would do no good. Hiccup was stubborn as a rock and if even Stoick couldn't make him rest and heal, then there was no hope that Gobber would succeed.

He glanced back at the lean shape, bruises still obvious on his pale face and sighed. _I just hope ye know what yer doing, laddie, he thought worriedly. And I hope that lass of yours can stop yer going too far._


	4. Conversion

**4: Conversion**

It had been a long two and a half weeks back on the Edge and Astrid felt that she had finally got things more or less back in shape. Admittedly, the twins and Snotlout had slacked off as soon as her back was turned but she had worked into her schedule an unpredictable time when she would come along and check if they were actually doing the task they had been assigned. And while they argued, there was an acceptance that she was Hiccup's unquestioned second in command and so they turned back to their jobs with a bad grace.

It didn't stop some of their shenanigans, of course. The boars had escaped the twins' boar-pit, stampeding through Fishlegs's tranquility rock garden, upsetting the husky Gronckle rider for almost a week as he strove the restore the crushed plants and replace and renew the smashed rocks and arrangement. Chicken had become broody and had stolen Heather's favourite top, leading to the spit incident where Chicken had been in real danger of becoming dinner. Tuff had been in a huff for three days afterwards-as had Heather, who was struggling to get the chicken droppings of her clothes. And they had finally retrained the Night Terrors to perch on the lookouts and alert them if they saw anything-much to Astrid's relief.

She was just doing the rounds to check the state of the repairs and considering letting them have a half-day off when Stormfly gave an excited squawk and as Astrid looked up, her eyes widened in delight-for in the distance but closing fast was the familiar streamlined black shape of a Night Fury. Hiccup was finally coming back. A weight lifted from Astrid's chest as she sat bolt upright, waving, then leaned forward and drove Stormfly on to escort their leader back in. But as they approached, he didn't slow and she had to spin round and scramble after the speeding Toothless as he soared down and put in a hard deceleration to land on the main platform by the stables. Stormfly screeched indignantly and Toothless raised his head and gave a weary croon of greeting, giving his toothless grin at the Deadly Nadder. Astrid stared at the shape of the rider, her eyes widening in shock as Hiccup straightened up-or at least, she assumed it was Hiccup because he was wearing some very unfamiliar fierce-looking black leather armour that concealed his head in a black leather mask and helmet, about an inch of dark auburn hair sticking out under the back of the helmet. He unclipped himself from the Night Fury, gently stroking the flattened muzzle.

"Hiccup!" Astrid called and ran to him, throwing a hug around him. He stiffened for a second, then returned it, the unfamiliar armour much harder then she has was used to and unyielding, making the hug pretty uncomfortable. Then he pulled away, he flipped the blank face-mask up to reveal his tired face and glittering green eyes and then pulled the helmet off completely, ruffling his very tousled auburn locks.

"Hi Astrid," he said quietly and she stared at him.

"You don't know how happy I am to see you," she said in a rush. "The twins and Snot are just…them! And we've got the defences back up and running but I don't know what else you planned and…" She paused and stared into his neutral face. "I missed you," she added with feeling. "You're my best friend and honestly, I miss talking to you."

He stared into the glorious blue eyes and read her happiness and relief that he was back and gave a small smile.

"I think the others won't be so keen to have me back when they realise vacation's over," he said dryly and she stared at him, then burst out laughing.

"Oh, I gotta see this," she laughed, then looked him up and down. His black armour covered his torso, the pauldrons and vambraces making him look bulkier and more powerful. There was still a red Night Fury on his right shoulder and the face was Hiccup but his posture was different. And he was wearing several weapons, including Inferno and a conventional sword… "And new armour…" Her tone was admiring and he managed his familiar lopsided smile.

"Well, I needed a little more protection, Milady," he said with a small bow. "And my old armour was ruined…" Astrid smiled and walked alongside him as they headed for the Clubhouse, seeing him a little stiffer than before. But as soon as he walked in, the rest of the gang was on their feet.

"Hiccup! It's good to have you back!"

"The chicken is so pleased you're home!"

"It just wasn't the same. No one here cares at all that the Night Terrors are exhibiting an entirely new behaviour…"

"Yeah, maybe you can stop Astrid the Tyrant from working us all to death! Seventeen straight days on defences and patrols! Oh come on!"

"I'm glad you're back-now can we have a vacation?"

Hiccup smiled at his friends and looked around, seeing Tuff's latest offering over the fire-fortunately devoid of any questionable herbs or fungi-which they all promised to check after the hallucinating mushroom episode. He grabbed a portion and sat at the table.

"It's great to be back," he admitted, tearing into his food urgently. "I've been planning how we can improve our defensive capabilities and the coverage of the patrols…"

Snotlout rolled his eyes and took a huge bite of his roast yak chops. "…and Captain Tyrant is back," he muttered. Hiccup stiffened but inspected his food with a small smile.

"We'll see," he said quietly, taking another mouthful. Then he looked up with his old smile. "So Fish-tell me what the Terrors have been up to?"

oOo

Astrid was up early, stretching and washing quietly before braiding her hair and going out for a morning fly on Stormfly. Heather had done night patrol and was still sound asleep so Astrid went to great pains not to disturb her friend. The sun was just risen and the sky was still orange, though brightening to blue rapidly. But when she reached the stables. Hiccup was already there, scowling at the dragons and the only person arriving. He shook his head.

"Who is supposed to be on stable duty this morning?" he asked curtly and Astrid blushed.

"Me," she said quickly, "and I'm here, aren't I?" His cool emerald gaze flicked over her shape, his expression challenging.

"You were here for a flight, weren't you?" he accused her and she nodded, her chin lifted proudly.

"Of course-Mr Always-Goes-For-A-Morning-Flight-Before-Anything-Else!" she retorted.

"This isn't about me, Astrid," he told her firmly.

"And it shouldn't be about me either!" she snapped back. "I never shirk my duty-but Stormfly needs exercise which is why I'm here to finish my flight before the others are awake. Even I know not to try waking Hookfang until he's ready to get up. All that happens is he sets fire to something and then goes back to sleep!" He shook his head.

"And who was yesterday?" Hiccup asked shortly, his eyes focussing on the globules of luminous dragon poop piled in the corner of the stables. Astrid looked over and rolled her eyes.

"Snotlout," she muttered under her breath, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment. "I will…"

"I'll take care of it," Hiccup snapped. "Go and exercise Stormfly then get back here to do your duty. Meet me in the Clubhouse in one hour!" She stared at him but he had already turned and strode away. Unnerved, she let Stormfly out and looked into her dragon's face.

"If anything, it's gotten worse," she sighed. The dragon gave a little trill. "No, I don't know what to do. Maybe he'll calm down?" Stormy rolled her eye. "No, I don't think so either. He must have been more shaken up by the bounty hunters than we thought." She leapt onto her dragon. "I guess we'll just have to see how it goes and see if we can get our old Hiccup back."

oOo

By the time she had exercised Stormfly and made sure the dragons all had fish and fresh water, Astrid was late and had to scramble to the Clubhouse in a real hurry. She raced through the door and stood at the back as Hiccup glared at them.

"It's not good enough," he said sternly. "Your defences are sloppy, your watch-towers are inadequately checked and patrols are non-existent! I asked you to get the Edge ready for when I returned and what do I find?"

Astrid felt the criticism like a blow: she had set everything up as he had always wanted, shoring up defences, making it all safe and sound and as he had preferred it. She had even improved the western approach and it had almost killed her to keep the others in line. It felt like a personal attack on her competence as a leader and as a warrior and she folded her arms abruptly, glaring at him but didn't say a word. She didn't need to, because others were just as indignant.

"Hey-we worked our asses off!" Snotlout shouted, standing up. "Just because you were lying on yours, getting over being kidnapped like a little girl!" Hiccup's eyes flashed.

"You know, Snotlout, you just volunteered to do a solo sweep of the north of the island and check every single watch tower!" Hiccup told him sternly. Snotlout gave a laugh.

"Firstly, there is only one watch tower there-hah!-and secondly, who made you the boss of me?" he argued.

"Yeah-tyrant!" Tuff muttered loudly. Hiccup's brows dipped in a scowl.

"My father, the Chief sent us out here to the 'Great Beyond' to discover more about dragons and maybe find Dagur-and instead, we found a terrible enemy of dragonkind and of Berk," he said grimly. "The Hunters attacked us numerous times, they stole the DragonEye and took Berk's gold. Our people suffer because of them. It's time to fight back. And if you argue I am a tyrant-no, I'm not, but I was made your leader by Stoick the Vast. So stop bitching and do your duty to the Chief. Unless you're afraid…"

As expected, Snotlout leapt to his feet, proclaiming his courage, rapidly followed by the twins. Astrid rolled her eyes, refusing to rise to the bait because she was still unsure what Hiccup was planning. The way he was talking and behaving was very different to the optimistic, brilliant, brave but inclusive leader they all loved. He rolled plans out on the table and tapped the map of the Edge with his left hand.

"This is our current position and here are the defences," he began. He then lifted his charcoal pencil and drew greatly expanded defensive lines and armourments. "But we need much more. Our forward defences need to be bolstered all the way along the line and we need more ballistas here, here and here with smaller catapults every fifty yards along the line…"

"Question: who will fire all these catapults when we're fighting on dragon-back?" Heather asked thoughtfully. Hiccup stared at her.

"We need to have them available to cover every possible approach," Hiccup answered coolly. "So we'll start. Astrid-you're with Snotlout on this eastern section. Fishlegs-try to keep the twins in line on the sea wall, Heather-you're with me!" Astrid stared at him, glaring daggers. Generally, Hiccup knew to keep her from Snotlout because his cousin really irritated her but she guessed this was her punishment for not keeping him in line. Though, when she thought about it. he hadn't been able to keep Snotlout in line either. So she gritted her teeth, collected her axe and called Stormfly. Then, of course, Snotlout took ages to get Hookfang up, had his pants set on fire again and had spent the time they had travelled to their assigned construction work telling Astrid precisely how great he was and how he was much nicer than Hiccup, who seemed to have been hit over the head one time too many. And while she didn't agree that it was blows over the head-because Hiccup had been knocked out more times than she could remember, been in a coma, been delirious from fever at least five times and been struck by lightning-she could guess what had caused the change.

"I mean, I'm awesome anyway, babe and my skills in building defences…" Snotlout drawled on.

"…are as pathetic as your abilities to fly in formation, build an 'S' shaped house or stay awake on watch!" she finished, leaping down and beginning to cut down the first of many trees they would need for their reinforced defences. "Go find some useful rocks to buttress the second line," she told him. He leaned lazily back in his saddle.

"You're still fighting your attraction for me," he told her pityingly.

"No, I'm fighting my desire to chop you up-but if I did that, Hiccup would expect me to do your job as well as my own…" she snapped. He glared at her.

"Fine," he huffed. "But I'm only doing this because I wanna prove to Captain Hopalong that I am as good as him at building defences!"

"Whatever," she growled, not bothering to defend Hiccup against the comment, and continued chopping, listening with relief as the Monstrous Nightmare took off and headed for the nearest mountainside. For a long moment, she stared back in the direction of the Edge before resuming her work. She would put up with Snotlout for today-but she would need a break tomorrow. An she meant to talk to her friend about it. Silently she swore: Hiccup-you really owe me for this.

oOo

Heather shadowed Hiccup all day and what she saw concerned her. Hiccup was quiet, his eyes sweeping carefully across the defences, before accelerating up and getting a panoramic view of that section of the island. After about two hours of being totally ignored, she pulled alongside and shouted.

"Hey!" He started and looked at her, flipping his facemask up and nodding.

"What?" he asked. There was a pause.

"Is something wrong?" she asked. "Because I've never heard you be so quiet for so long. And if all I am here for is to even up the teams, I may as well be helping Astrid since she's got the worst job." His eyes inspected her coolly.

"Why do you say that?" he asked, causing her to glare at him.

"Are you for real? You know how annoying Snotlout is to her!" she argued. "You know how much she missed you and would really have preferred to stay with you on Berk? But she's already had over two weeks of Snotlout and the twins and she's ready to kill someone!" She glared at him but he didn't reply...until she made to peel away when he raised a hand.

"Hold on!" he ordered her. "You're not here to make up the numbers. You've been on your own for a while, have worked with the Hunters for some time and you are very capable of making decisive and ruthless tactical decisions, Heather. So I need you by my side at the moment to see if you can pick out any weaknesses I have missed!" He paused as she stared at him.

"But Astrid is far the best..." she began but he shook his head.

"Astrid...is limited," he said tonelessly. "She thinks like a Viking and is very predictable. She won't do everything needed to win. She has limits." He looked at her appraisingly and she felt a shiver run down her spine. "I don't think you do."

She peeled away then. Windshear dived and she lay low over her neck, arrowing down and away from the Night Fury, though she heard the whistle of air through great lack wings as Toothless roared after them. In moments, he had caught her up but she accelerated, dodging through the trees and between the rocky cliffs on this side of the island. Hiccup closed on her.

"You can't get away," he shouted after her, his voice muffled by the mask. "We played this game before, remember? And who won then?"

"And you forget something!" she shouted back. "I'm not from Berk-so I have no duty to obey you! And I can come and go as I please!" He urgently dodged as she fired a volley of spines at him and in that moment, she escaped up into the clouds, leaving Toothless hovering and staring at the silver missiles, embedded in the rock mere inches from his face.

 _What the Hel are you doing?_ he asked himself staring after the vanished Razorwhip. _You've insulted her, you've made her feel unwelcome and uncomfortable when she is already struggling. Dagur was her brother and he's dead because of you. But she is so much better at subterfuge and thinks in a different way. She understands revenge! But none of them seem to understand! How can they? They weren't hunted. Everyone was after me! And Viggo is still out there, plotting. If I don't make us ready to face him, we'll all end up dead!_

Toothless crooned and he automatically laid his hand on the dragon's flattened head, feeling the worried rumble through the contact. The Night Fury was deeply unhappy that his friend had flown away-and that he wasn't with his best friend, the Nadder, anyway. And the dragon was really unhappy because his cheerful, optimistic and kind Rider had changed and seemed to be pushing his friends away. For a second, Hiccup bowed his head, a deep breath sighing through him. His shoulder still twinged when he did extreme manoeuvres and chasing after Heather hadn't helped but for a moment, he welcomed the distraction.

_It's no good. No matter how awkward it feels, I have no other choice. I have to get them battle ready and make the Edge secure before I can move onto Phase Two...and make Viggo regret ever starting this!_


	5. Break

**5: Break**

"I can't believe he made us do this!" Fishlegs complained, stroking Meatlug and feeding the Gronckle some black granite-one of her favourite snacks. "We've been building new defences and drilling for the last week. Poor Meatlug's wings are dropping off. In fact, she so tired she's been sleep-flying again."

"Yeah, we had to clear up the lava and repair the holes in the floor when she burns through it as she drools," Ruff grumbled, lathering fish oil into her braids. Everyone was carefully sitting at the far side of the Clubhouse from her.

"And he really has some sort of grudge against Hookie and me," Snotlout complained.

"Well, you do keep getting set on fire and flying out of formation," Heather pointed out. Hiccup had chased her down when she had finally returned to the Edge and had quietly apologised, explaining what he meant and his sorrow at upsetting her. Grudgingly, she had forgiven him, though she couldn't understand why he keep insisting she partnered him in all exercises. In fact, she was feeling very embarrassed by it since she knew it was upsetting Astrid more and more, though the blonde would-be Shield Maiden was doing her best to hide it.

"I'm a free spirit and utterly awesome!" Snotlout protested.

"At incinerating yourself!" Ruff sniggered.

"Hey! I heard that!" Snotlout protested.

"So did the Chicken!" Tuff added. "And you are even worse at the drills than my sister!"

"Hey!"

"Guys," Fishlegs sighed. "Same dragon, remember?"

"I really don't think he does," Heather muttered to him.

"And there's another drill tomorrow," Snotlout moaned. "And I'm the enemy!"

"Type casting," Tuff sniggered.

"You take that back, mutton-head!"

"Hey! No one calls my mutton-headed brother a mutton-head except me!" Ruff snapped, rising to stand by her twin. In seconds, the three were a pile of fists flying and insults bouncing off the walls.

"Are they always like this?" Heather asked incredulously. Somehow, she had imagined they could at least be slightly adult some of the time. Fishlegs shook his head.

"Pretty much," he said heavily. "Have you seen Astrid? She can usually get them under control…"

"She's out training with her axe," Heather sighed.

"And he still hasn't spoken to her?" Fishlegs asked her worriedly.

"Only to assign her duties or criticise her," the raven-haired girl told him sadly, sipping her apple tea. "And she really doesn't understand why he's treating her like this."

"None of us do," Fishlegs replied in a concerned voice. "Or why he has changed so completely to us all."

oOo

Astrid had been training with her axe for a couple of hours after their latest not very successful drill, taking her frustrations out on whatever unfortunate trees got in her way. No matter how harshly Hiccup criticised her-and she was prepared to admit that she could always improve her skills, though she knew her standards hadn't slipped one bit-she was poised, strong and accurate, every blow and cut precise and deadly. She knew something was horribly wrong, that he was being unfair-but he wouldn't talk to her. He wouldn't say anything, taking food from the Clubhouse and eating in his hut, isolating himself away from the group and planning, always planning.

Finally, sweaty and exhausted, she headed back to the arena, deciding to do a little throwing practice before she bathed and went back to her hut. But as she arrived at the arena, someone else was already there; a familiar, tall lanky shape, sheathed in the bulky, aggressive black armour and wielding a sword was more balance and skill that she had seen previously. As she watched, he executed swift and accurate blows on the target, then pulled back, reset his position and executed again. Finally, as he dropped to a knee, he slashed and cut the target in half. Astrid stared, then rested her axe by her side and folded her arms. As he clambered to his feet, he turned-to see Astrid watching. He started, his emerald eyes widening-and then he drew back.

"How long have you been watching?" he asked her shortly.

"Long enough," Astrid told him calmly, admiring his balanced movements, far more precise and measured than her dorkish friend. "Your father has been tutoring you, hasn't he?" His eyes flicked up to inspect her and he nodded curtly.

"He is an excellent swordsman," he reminded her tonelessly. "Is there a reason why you're here?" She started at his unfriendly tone, her eyes widening in hurt but she pressed her lips tightly together.

"I was here to practice," she admitted quietly, "but while you're here, I need to ask you something." He sighed and turned back to her, his face carefully neutral. "What the Hel am I supposed to have done wrong, Hiccup?" she demanded. He frowned and stared at her, the gaze cold and remote, so unlike the generous, kind, enthusiastic, gently dorkish and brilliant boy she cared for.

"What do you mean?" he asked her. She advanced abruptly.

"I mean-I was sent away from you to bring the others back here," she said shortly. "I repaired the defences as you wanted. That you suddenly decide that you want things different is not for me to know-or guess! You could have sent a Terror if it was so Thor-damned important! Instead, you constantly make me partner Snotlout, you never speak to me, you actively avoid being with us. You are harsh and critical about everything and doubly to me. So what have I done to you, Hiccup?"

_We used to spend so much time together. I miss you. Gods, I miss you._

His eyes lingered on her face for a long moment and then he turned away.

"You're not good enough," he told her bluntly. "You have lost your edge. You won't take the ruthless action required…" Her fists clenched and she glared at him, all her frustration boiling over.

"Lost my edge?" she hissed dangerously. "And why is that, I wonder? I was the best warrior-and the best at fighting dragons, Hiccup! I was prepared to turn you in to be outcast as a traitor for befriending Toothless! How was that not taking ruthless action? But you kidnapped me and forced me to see the truth about dragons. When your Final Exam went wrong, I went in there with you to help get you out. I stood by your side through everything, through your disgrace and outcasting, through training the dragons and you almost dying and losing your leg! If I have lost my edge, it's because you always stopped me. You always sought the peaceful solution. You never fired first. You wanted to talk rather than fight. And you hated killing. You never went for the kill. So I had to stop and crush my instincts because that was who you are-and I cared for you and didn't want to disappoint you. You are my friend, Hiccup-and the fact you won't fly with me when we always flew together each day, that you won't talk or laugh with me…that you ignore my existence…it hurts. And you don't even have the Gods-damned courage to tell me what's wrong!"

"Are you jealous?" he asked softly, his eyes narrowing.

"No, I'm furious!" she shouted. "You don't treat friends like this, Hiccup. You don't suddenly decide that someone you seemed to care for, that you spend so much time with every single day, wasn't good enough when they always had been. If you are a friend, if you care for someone, you talk to them, you explain, you sort it out!"

"I have," he told her shortly. "I've partnered you with Snotlout."

"And you know that won't work, don't you?" she sneered back.

"Are you refusing to obey my orders?" he challenged her softly. She shook her head, unable to read anything on his carefully neutral face.

"Only when they are totally insane!" she snapped. "But I tell you now, using Snotlout how you plan in the drill won't work. He'll showboat and mess everything up."

"No, he won't," Hiccup said coldly. "I'll ground him if he does. But the next drill isn't a drill: it's a mission. And Snotlout will obey because even he isn't stupid enough to deliberately get everyone killed." She stared at him.

"So what's the target?' she asked interestedly but he gave her such cold stare she shivered and frowned.

"You'll be told when necessary," he said abruptly, sheathing his sword and walking past her. "You'll be notified when there's a briefing."

"You haven't answered me!" she shouted after him. "I don't buy the 'not good enough' yak dung, Hiccup! I'm better than you ever will be. So tell me-or are you so gutless you can't even share what's on your mind?"

He froze then, his shoulders stiffening under his pauldrons.

"You're not what I need any more, Astrid," he said coldly. "Accept it-because it isn't changing. I'm sorry-but you're clinging onto a Hiccup who no longer exists!" And with that he walked out, leaving her to take a suddenly shaky breath, her eyes inexplicably burning with utter despair. He couldn't have made it plainer: the boy she cared for-the boy she loved-wanted nothing more to do with her.

And Astrid still didn't have a clue what she had done wrong to lose him.

oOo

Hiccup said nothing to the team and though Astrid knew he was taking them on a live mission, she wasn't sure what to say-because she knew nothing. So she watched him with resentment in her eyes and a broken heart as he flew alongside Heather and exchanged more than a few words with her while she was stuck with Snotlout spouting off about how fed up he was and how Hiccup was always underestimating Snotlout's Odin-given talents… She rolled her eyes.

"Then why don't you tell him?" she snapped. He visibly paled.

"Um…I mean…nah…I'm so awesome I don't need to tell anyone…" he said swiftly, trying to cover up. Turning away, Astrid stared stolidly ahead, her eyes focussed on the horizon, seeking signs of the Hunters' ships because she couldn't bear to see Hiccup chatting to Heather. And it was starting to affect her friendship with the girl as well-because Astrid was jealous, no matter how much she told herself that Heather wasn't interested in Hiccup that way. And Heather was very embarrassed but wouldn't reveal what Hiccup would speak to her about, further fuelling Astrid's anger and isolation. So she was the first one to see…

"HUNTER SHIPS AHEAD!" she shouted, pointing. Hiccup instantly snatched his spyglass out and stared.

"Good," he breathed. "Positions! Snot, Astrid-left flank. Twins, Fishlegs-to the right. Heather and I will go straight through for the largest ship. Soar high first and then accelerate as you attack. Positions!"

Snotlout gave a whoop as he took Hookfang higher. "This is what I'm talking about," he shouted smugly. "Come on, babe-fly with a real man and we can kick some Hunter butt!" Astrid gripped Stomfly's saddle and leaned forward, watching Hiccup and Heather pull ahead and lead the attack. She glanced at Snotlout but he was already grinning and shouting orders at Hookfang-and then arrows started zipping around them. Astrid shouted a warning and dinked sideways, lying low over her dragon as they accelerated down.

And then they heard the whine and explosion of a plasma blast as Toothless attacked with immense force. The mast of the central ship shattered and the ship shook int he water. Snotlout gave a huge whoop and poured flames down on the left hand ship and Astrid attacked the Hunters manning the ballistas and bows.

"Take the left, Snot, and keep them busy," she ordered, stitching another violet of spines across the deck. The Hunters were ducking for cover as they soared down and Stormfly slammed them aside. Without hesitating, Astrid charged down the stairs and slammed the two guards aside with her axe, then raced to the cages, dragging the doors open and shooing the distressed imprisoned dragons out. It was only when she released the last one that she emerged, findings Snotlout whooping around and showboating-as she had feared-while the twins and Fishlegs were struggling. Leaping aboard the Deadly Nadder, Astrid took off and headed rapidly for the other ship, taking out the men working the winch for the dragon-proof chains wrapped around Meatlug. As soon as the pull was released, she flew up, ripping the winch straight off the deck of the ship. The twins whooped and exploded half of the hull.

"Awesome!" Tuff screamed.

"Get those dragons free!" Astrid shouted as Snotlout whooped and barrel-rolled, attacking the central ship. Hiccup's head snapped up, emerald eyes narrowing under the mask as he saw his cousin disobeying his orders-as Astrid had warned you, he reminded himself grimly. The twins were all over the place as well, blowing up everything in sight at random. Astrid had freed her dragons, saved Fishlegs and was trying to call the others to order.

"Get back to your position!" he yelled at her and her head snapped round. Her eyes widened and then she wordlessly turned away.

"Come on, Stormfly," she shouted, soaring up and holding position above the left hand ship. Toothless fired again and the central ship shuddered, listing. Heather was on the deck, freeing dragons when a Hunter grabbed her. Hiccup was soaring up and with a shocked look, Astrid flipped the Nadder round, launching a singe spine shot that impaled the Hunter. He dropped Heather immediately and she stared up in shock, nodding a silent thanks as Hiccup leapt from Toothless and located the Captain.

"Free the dragons," he ordered curtly, then grabbed the Captain, his sword in his hand. The man gave a scornful laugh.

"Who are you supposed to be?" he sneered. "The Masked Rider?" Without even pausing, Hiccup drove the point of his sword hard into the man's side and held him still as he screamed and tried to jerk away. Toothless growled and the Hunter Captain froze as Hiccup flipped his face mask up.

"No," he hissed. 'Hiccup Haddock. And you're only being spared to take a message to Viggo and Ryker." He leaned closer and twisted the point of the sword in the man' side and was rewarded by a pained cry. "Tell them, I"m coming for them. I want Viggo to regret even imagining he could get rid of me by killing me. So I am going to sink every Thor-damned ship and free every Thor-damned dragon until Viggo is begging to surrender!" Then he pushed the man back and he collapsed onto his back, clutching at his bleeding side. The twins flew by, whooping and blowing up the side of the adjacent ship-until he saw what was happening. Suddenly silent, they flew back on to the crunch and splinter of tearing wood. Staring coldly at the helpless Captain for a long moment, Hiccup flipped his mask down and leapt back onto the Night Fury. Without waiting, Toothless backwinged up and covered the deck until Heather was clear.

"Sink the other ships!" Hiccup ordered and Astrid stared at him but Snotlout didn't hesitate, flaming at their ship and blasting a hole in the side. Shaking her head, Astrid flipped Stormfly round and blasted out the stern, seeing the water begin to rush into the stricken ship and hoping the crew had time to get away. The twins and Fishlegs were looping pass after pass on their ship until it began to dive backwards under the waves while Hiccup stood point over his ship. For a long moment, he stared at the deck, then leaned forward.

"Do it, bud," he breathed and the Night Fury's throat filled with purple plasma, the whine building and building-and then he fired. The blast punched straight through the deck-and down through the hull. The ship immediately began to sink as everyone stared at him.

"You said you were going to spare him!" Fishlegs pointed out in a shocked voice. Hiccup gave a small smile under his mask.

"I lied," he said grimly. "If he survives, he can carry my message. If not-there are always other ships…and other Captains…"

But as they flew back towards the Edge, everyone was sharing worried looks. The ruthless, unprovoked way he had stabbed the Hunter Captain-and then condemned the crew to drown was the opposite of their friend…and the Riders were wondering who Hiccup had become. And if he was prepared to go so far without hesitation…what would he do next-and expect them to do for him?

oOo

It was late and even the Night Patrol had gotten in but one person on the Edge was still awake: in the quiet and dark of his room, Hiccup was staring at the ceiling, memorising every single grain of the planks and knot in the wood. Sleep eluded him-as it had every night since he was snatched from Ryker's hands. Eventually, knowing he was miles from sleep, he slowly say up, the patchwork blanket sliding down his body. He had shed the armour, his boot and prosthetic and was lying in his tunic and leggings, his complete leg pulled up to rest his knee against his chest, his other leg curled under body. He gave a sigh and stared into the darkness.

"They don't understand," he breathed, his fingers drifting across his neck, where the hardness from the bruising was still discernible.

 _Of course not,_ Ryker said coldly. _They're mindless fools. They don't listen. They don't have to guts to do what has to be done._

Hiccup's breaths accelerated and he wrapped his arms desperately around his body. Toothless cracked a bleary green eye open a sliver, seeing his Rider rigid with fear, pressed back against the headboard of his bed, his eyes staring wildly into the empty darkness. It happened most nights, though this seemed more intense than usual-so the Night Fury pricked his ears and listened carefully to his Rider as he tried to respond to his invisible tormentor.

"You won't get your hands on them," he breathed. "They are stronger than you."

_And what about that girl of yours? Or your father? How will they cope when we send the Bounty Hunters after them? How will you cope when we return the girl's dead body to you?_

"She's nothing to me," Hiccup breathed, his voice shaking slightly. "I'm stronger than that."

_Liar. You are weak. I've looked into your eyes as I held you down. I've seen the fear._

"I'm coming for you, Ryker," he said in a low voice. "I won't stop. You started this war. You attacked us. You set men to kill me. But I will end it."

_Didn't you enjoy what we did. Hiccup Haddock? I enjoyed your screams. I enjoyed your blood. And when you try to avenge yourself, I will enjoy watching you slaughtered. Maybe we'll kill your friends and your dragons and keep you alive with the knowledge of your failure. Of your weakness._

I am not weak!" Hiccup shouted, eyes blazing with anger. "No one will ever capture me like a beast again! I. Am. Not. Weak!"

_And yet I'm still free and I know what happened, what you said, Hiccup. What you gave up._

Hiccup covered his face, his shoulders shuddering with dry sobs.

"No," he whispered brokenly. "I only gave up myself. And you…"

_You're mine-whenever I come for you, Hiccup Haddock. And when we meet again, you will die._


	6. Tackle

**Six: Tackle.**

The team were looking more and more concerned as they flew away from the latest raid. And it was a raid, not a mission. During every attack, Hiccup had located the most senior hunter and forced him to betray at least one other Hunter location-a depot, a shipyard, the next convoy, a village…maybe even a auction. Slowly, methodically, he was destroying the Hunter assets, sinking boats, freeing dragons-and killing. And that was the problem as they all shared worried glances as they flew behind their masked leader on his Night Fury.

In the last attack, they had ruthlessly rained fire and spines down onto a Hunter depot-just a post for provisioning ships with only a couple of trapped dragons who were easily freed. The Hunters-a poor selection-had known little but Hiccup had blown up their homes and destroyed everything they had, stranding them with nothing on a small and isolated island. But when Astrid had protested, he had rounded on her.

"I've given them a chance to fetch food and survive," he snapped. "They are free. These trolls planned to kill me, Astrid. They were a few hours from getting me to Viggo to die." Blinking, she stared as he accelerated away, ignoring the scornful look Snotlout gave her-but Heather and Fishlegs were looking more than concerned at the change. Hiccup had needed reminding to release the captive dragons, his entire focus on punishing the Hunters rather than rescuing their victims. Even Toothless had been unhappy and had folded his wings, taking him down to the cages to remind him. But Hiccup had some leads and was silently oblivious to his friends, deep in his thoughts. It was a very uncomfortable flight home.

Once they had reached the Edge, Hiccup dismissed them, leaving those assigned to tend the dragons and headed back up to his hut with Toothless in tow. The others headed up as well but Astrid and Heather-who were on stable duty-remained, unsaddling the dragons, giving them all fish and water and carefully locking them away in their cages. Astrid was always uncomfortable when they were locked up so early in the day but it was Hiccup's orders and no one was minded to argue with him. For a long moment, the blonde lingered with her dragon, gently stroking the Nadder's nose horn and murmuring to her. Heather watched, hanging back-because it was becoming awkward between them. Ever since they returned to the Edge, Astrid had been distancing herself from the other girl, the anger and disdain in her eyes growing by the day-until Heather stepped forward.

"Ast-we have to talk," she said seriously. Blue eyes flicked up and the gently stroking hands on the Nadder stopped.

"Why?" Astrid asked her directly. Heather moved closer, her green eyes worried.

"Because you're treating me like I'm the enemy," she said honestly.

"And you aren't?" Astrid asked her shortly, looking back at Stormfly. Taking a sharp breath, Heather deliberately stepped into there line of sight.

"No!" she protested. Astrid looked up, her face impatient. "Why would you ask that?" Blonde brows dipped in a scowl.

"Well, apparently I'm no longer what Hiccup needs any more-and he always partners himself with you now-so what am I supposed to think?" she asked sarcastically.

"Astrid-you know I…" Heather began but Astrid turned to face her, her face angry.

"Really? Why should I believe you? You've done this before, haven't you?" she snapped. Heather gasped: it was true that she had deliberately tried to isolate Astrid and make Hiccup think she was interested in him the first time they had met, back when her adoptive parents had been prisoners of Alvin the Treacherous but they had long since moved past that. Her shock began to give way to anger.

"You know that was a long time ago and I was forced to do that to get the Book of Dragons for Alvin!" she replied more sharply than she had intended. With a breath, she shook her head. "Astrid, you are my friend and I…"

"Are you?" Astrid asked her pointedly. "Have you spoken to me about this? Have you kept me in the loop? Have you done one Thor-damned thing to make my life any less miserable right now? Or have you looked after yourself and just stuck with Fishlegs and said…nothing…?" Heather gave a gasp and stared at Astrid.

"I don't like Hiccup that way," she protested gently. "I'm not sure if I like him any way, any more. He's…changed…" Astrid stared at her remotely.

"Yes, he has," Astrid said quietly, "but I still care for him." She turned back to her dragon and sighed. "Before Hiccup persuaded me to follow him, I was joining the Berk Guard. I was committing to protecting our home. I followed Hiccup because he wanted to follow his dream, to discover new dragons and have adventures…but we're not chasing dragons any more and the adventures aren't fun. I'm a good warrior, a good Rider and I will do what is needed to keep us safe-but suddenly that isn't good enough any more. Suddenly, I seem to be a liability. So why should I stay here, to be ignored and humiliated and treated like dirt? I'm going back to Berk, to join the Berk Guard. Hiccup can continue destroying himself on his own." Then she gave the dragon a final pat and turned away, walking past Heather without even sparing her a look and vanishing round the corner. The raven-haired girl stared after her and heard the Nadder give a worried trill.

"Yeah," she sighed. "I really think she will leave. And if she does…that will be the end."

oOo

Hiccup was poring over his charts in his hut, the carefully copied map of the Archipelago and the Great Beyond spread over the table. Small pins marked Viggo's outposts, depots and bases and the Rider splayed his fingers on the map, brow furrowing as he calculated his next move.

"Where are you?" he murmured, emerald eyes sweeping across the symbols. "What are you planning, Viggo?"

 _Your destruction, our enrichment and of course, capturing your dragon,_ Ryker said. Hiccup stiffened and sighed.

"You'll never get Toothless," he said. The Night Fury's head snapped up, hearing the weary tone, his ear-flaps twitching.

 _I can make you give him up,_ Ryker commented, pacing around the stiff, armoured shape. _I know what you can't endure. Who thought that through all that sass and obstinacy, you had a weakness._ He paced around the rigid Rider. _You're all weakness._

"There are more ships coming in from the east with dragons," Hiccup murmured. He froze as he heard footsteps approach and he straightened up, scowling at the interruption. He turned abruptly as the intruder approached-and he untended slightly as he saw Heather and Fishlegs. Wordlessly, he beckoned them in, turning back to his map. "How many dragons have we freed in the last week, Fish?" he asked curtly. The husky young man shared a glance with Heather and checked his notebook.

"About fifty," he said nervously and he flinched as Hiccup growled.

"About?"

"We don't have completely accurate figures!" Fishlegs protested. "The twins and Snotlout never give an accurate answer on numbers and types of dragons released. It has to be an estimate only because of that!"

"Not good enough," Hiccup snapped, his tone cold. "How can I plan when I don't have accurate intelligence?"

"You get the twins to give you a useful answer!" Fishlegs retorted. "And Snotlout…"

"Astrid is partnered with Snotlout," Hiccup reminded Fishlegs. "Ask her why there aren't accurate figures for her team."

"So it's her team, is it?" Heather asked him pointedly. "I don't think so-and nor does anyone else. You always address every comment and all instructions to Snotlout. You've relegated her from your second in command to not even leading that team."

"I expected better of her," Hiccup said coldly.

"You know, I think she expected better of you," Fishlegs replied.

Hiccup slowly turned to face him, his eyes narrowed.

"Just do your damned job properly, Fishlegs," he hissed. "I will decide who does what in this outpost!"

There was a cold silence-and then Fishlegs left. Heather turned after him but Hiccup grasped her arm.

"How long does Viggo have between auctions?" he asked. She glared at him until he released her.

"As long as he wants," she replied sharply, angered at he treatment of another of her friends. Hiccup looked at her.

"This soon?" he asked thoughtfully.

"Possibly," she conceded. "I wasn't with them that long, but he was a man with his own plans and priorities. But he was always organised…"

"Viggo's stockpiling. So that can only mean…he's planning another auction." His eyes flicked up to look at her. "And that should mean we have an opportunity to attack-and get the gold back…" She inspected him and read the determination in his face.

"That still bothers you, doesn't it?" she said softly. He nodded silently.

"My failure condemned Berk to poverty," he said in a toneless voice. "The plan was weak, the execution was worse and we were comprehensively outmanoeuvred by Viggo. We escaped by luck. We can't rely on that. So this time, we will be more direct. We go in, we take the gold, we leave." Toothless gave a small croon and Heather stared at the dragon, understanding his qualms. There was a part of the plan that was missing.

"What about the dragons?" she asked. Hiccup flicked his emerald gaze up to briefly look at her before staring at his chart once more.

"They aren't important," he said.

oOo

The next mission was a disaster, the team getting ambushed by a trio of Hunter ships that were not apparently carrying any dragons but instead acting as decoys-and laden with ballistas and Dragon Root arrows. Hiccup had flipped his mask down and led a furious dive at the leading ship, a volley of plasma shots raking the first ship. Heather followed him dutifully, silvery Razorwhip spines stitching the deck and jamming the nearest bola- and chain launcher. To their left, the twins and Fishlegs were meeting some severe resistance, dozens of arrows raining on them. Fishlegs and Meatlug were both struck as was Tuffnut, who slid from the saddle of Belch and slammed onto the deck below. Meatlug was sagging lower and lower as the Dragon Root took effect and Fishlegs was bleeding from his wound, skilfully winding bandages from his pack around the hole in his arm.

Astrid glanced up and saw their predicament. The left hand ship was pounding at the attackers and no one was coming to help. Hiccup had drilled them over and over to focus on their part of the mission, shouting at them for doing what came naturally to them: helping and protecting each other. Tuff was being surrounded, swords jabbing at his stunned body.

"TUFF!" his twin screamed and the Zippleback gave a mournful roar as the male twin was hauled to his feet, a sword pressed to his throat.

"Surrender!" the Hunter holding him bellowed.

"Snotlout-take out that ship!" Astrid ordered him, flipping the Nadder round and barrelling round to line up on the man behind Tuff, never hesitating to press the one point on the back of the Nadder's skull that launched the lethal single spine shot. And while Stormfly was inhumanly accurate, Astrid rarely used the lethal attack to kill-but with Tuff in such danger, she felt a small thrill of satisfaction at seeing the man fall and release the twin.

"Snotlout! Snotlout! Oi! Oi! Oi!" echoed from behind her and the right hand ship exploded in flames. They were still firing but she waved at Snotlout and he got Hookfang to fire as Stormfly launched a wide spread of spines that caught fire as they zinged through the Monstrous Nightmare flames and took out anyone and anything left standing on the deck. But before they had even struck, she was waving Snotlout on and the powerful boy drove his dragon forward, swooping down to grab Meatlug and her Rider while Stormfly snatched Tuff away and zoomed up, depositing him safely back on Belch's neck.

"Thanks, Ast," Ruff called.

"You need to lose some weight!" Snotlout added, peering worriedly at Fishlegs. He was looking pale and the bandage around his arm was bloodstained.

"Just…husky!" the blonde boy complained painfully. "Is Meatlug okay?" Snotlout peered down and saw the Gronkle drooling lava. He rolled his eyes.

"Just peachy," he commented. "She'll have dribbled a small island by the time we get you home-right, Hookie?" The Monstrous Nightmare snorted, then swung around, narrowly missing a huge missile. "Little help, babe?"

"For the million-and-oneth time- I AM NOT YOUR BABE!" Astrid shouted at him, leaning forward and flipping round to get Stormfly to pour her astonishingly hot flame down on the stern of the boat. As expected, the rudder shattered and the ship began to list as water flooded in.

"Allow us," Tuff suggested, having bandaged his leg very badly using his belt and his vest. "Okay, dear sister-let's show them how a Zippleback finishes things…"

"I guess they probably know," Ruff commented, as the right hand head poured the sweet, greenish gas over the listing ship like a pungent fog. Tuff flashed her a grin.

"Not Thorston style!" he challenged her and they booth whooped and screamed as they ignited the explosive and soared up through the expanding explosion. Overhead, the Night Fury hovered, emerald eyes narrowing at the complete disobedience of his orders-which had saved the lives of three of the group. The Hunters had been prepared-and that meant that Viggo had changed things up. He gestured to Heather and the girl pinned down the defenders on the deck as he had instructed her while he swooped down and leapt from Toothless, racing for the Captain. The bigger man backed up as the armed, masked man ran at him with a naked sword.

""You're going to carry a message to Viggo!" Hiccup growled, grabbing the man around the neck, the point of his sword leaning over the man's heart. The Hunter paled, his eyes flicking to the left and Hiccup leaned closer. "This is a trap, isn't it?" he breathed. The man nodded.

"Viggo wants to capture you because you've sunk so many ships recently…" he gabbled, eyes wide with anxiety. Facing the mask with only small holes hinting at the angry emerald eyes behind had him fearful: he couldn't guess what the man would do…but he was a thousand leagues from the auburn-haired Night Fury Rider who always spared the crews and just rescued dragons. Hiccup glanced up and saw what he was expecting: three very large Hunter ships rounding the nearest island, the central one clearly Viggo's flagship.

"Time for the message," Hiccup growled, hauling the man back to the Night Fury and holding him helpless as he clipped his metal leg into the tail assembly. Toothless backwinged up and turned to face the flagship, which was rapidly approaching. Hiccup flew forward, the Hunter dangling from his grasp. "VIGGO!"

He saw the man glance up, the huge shape of Ryker at his side, the man's dark eyes sending shudders of fear down his spine. Breathing hard, the Dragon Rider stared down-and then moved. The Hunter felt a sudden blinding pain in his chest as the sword slammed into his heart and then his senses left him. His lifeless body was pitched onto the deck by the Grimborns.

"I AM COMING FOR YOU BOTH!" Hiccup shouted as he turned Toothless, the plasma blast shattering the last ship and then zooming away from the sinking wreck. The Riders followed him, shocked…and every eye trailed to Astrid. She was his second-in-command..and their only chance to stop this war before it got any worse-and one of them died.

oOo

Dark eyes trailed over the retreating shape of the Night Fury and then flicked over the corpse of his Captain. Viggo Grimborn cast a sideway look at his brother.

"He seems rather…driven," he commented. "I would ask what you did to him, Ryker, but I can guess." His older brother scowled at his, huge arms folded as he challenged his brother to comment further. "I do recall leaving instructions that I was to kill him myself."

"You didn't specify how he was to arrive at your feet-except alive," Ryker pointed out coldly. "And he has caused so much embarrassment that he deserved to feel some of the pain we have suffered from his actions." Viggo stared at the dead Hunter and motioned his crew to clear the body away.

"You clearly went too far, Ryker," he said thoughtfully. "Your brutality seems to have broken Hiccup."

"That was the intention," the older Grimborn told him. "I wanted to break him every way-and I got the defences of the Edge from him…"

"Which he will have amended as soon as he came back," Viggo pointed out calmly. "However, he's behaving much more like any other Viking, if today's show is any proof."

"He's looking for revenge," Ryker sneered. "I really had some fun with him." Viggoo rolled his eyes.

"He's disrupted our supply lines," he commented thoughtfully, "but he must realise we are planning another auction."

"He was whining about Berk's gold," Ryker revealed. "He'll want to steal it back…"

"So we set him a honey trap he can't resist," the leader of the Hunters mused. "Get the word out to the Traders that we're having another auction on Kaupmadur Island. Dragons and dragon parts. Ensure word gets out that I'll be there so conduct the sales myself. And Ryker…" His brother paused, scowling. "Make sure Hiccup and his little gang get there. Make sure they get word."

"The Traders talk to them because they have helped them in the past," he growled. "They'll be there." Viggo nodded and stared at the few floating pieces of wreckage that were all that remained of three more of his ships.

"Good-because everyone on that island will be a Hunter," he snapped. "Guards, wranglers, customers, traders, vendors, artisans…everyone will be our man. And there will be enough dragons to tempt them in…but no gold. Only dragon-proof steel. Enough for Hiccup and his stupid little friends. And when we have him, I will make sure he watches me kill all his friends before I finally end his life." He paused and looked up at his brother. "And I'll give him to you to play with before I finish him, brother-provided you don't damage him any more!" Ryder's eyes narrowed.

"I think I've done just enough damage to render him vulnerable."

oOo

Astrid was flying perimeter patrol once the others had got back to the Edge. It was her turn and Fishlegs and Tuffnut had adequate medical help with Heather as well as the husky boy himself. Meatlug was dozing in the stables and the other dragons were watching over her. But one wasn't: Astrid's blue Terrible Terror, Sneaky, was sitting in her saddlebag, a message tied to his leg.

The image flashing before her eyes was that breath-stopping moment when Hiccup had mercilessly stabbed the unarmed Hunter Captain and dropped his lifeless body on Viggo's ship. He hadn't come to the aid of their injured friends and would have left Tuff, Fishlegs and Meatlug at their mercy-but worse, he had chewed them all out for breaking ranks and disobeying orders in the rescue.

"You displayed weakness, vulnerability to them!" he shouted. "They will know they can use you against each other!"

"So not news!" Snotlout had raged back, his blue eyes angry. Hookfang was getting very tired lugging the unconscious Meatlug back and the boy felt sorry for his dragon-and his injured friends. "Hiccup-we've been fighting them for months now-so they know us. What's changed is you've turned into a total ass and would leave the rest of us to crash and burn as long as your precious mission got done!"

"This isn't a game, Snot!" Hiccup shouted. "People get hurt. People will get killed."

"Er-injured people here?" Fishlegs protested from behind Snotlout. "I think we know that…"

"Not here-on Berk!" Hiccup yelled. "We've endangered them. Dagur has attacked them because we went up against him. We've lost the gold so the island is poor, food is short and our people are suffering. We have to get it back before people start dying!"

"And getting us all killed won't help!" Ruff shouted at him, furious. They might fight like cats and dogs, but the twins were ferociously protective of one another.

"You've changed, man," Tuff added, his voice tight with pain. "Our friend wouldn't abandon us to die so he could land and murder a prisoner in cold blood!"

"That's why I was captured do easily," Hiccup yelled back, fists clenched. "The Hiccup you knew wasn't good enough. That's why he's gone-and why I'm here! Now get back to the damned base!"

Astrid stroked Stormfly as they looped round the northern watch tower and she scanned the horizon carefully. His indifference and anger directed at everyone-but most at her, for saving the injured-had solidified her determination. Something had to be done and the others had all begged her to try to talk some sense into Hiccup. But she knew she wouldn't be successful: there was only one person who could be.

The Night Terrors were gathering for the night duty and she slowly hovered, pulling out Sneaky. She petted the little dragon, staring into the bright eyes. She had trained Sneaky herself and knew the dragon was extremely reliable in whatever task she set him.

"I'm relying on you," she said intensely. "We all need you to succeed. Take care, Sneaky. Now go find the Chief and give him that message!"

The dragon thoughtfully licked its eye then flapped off without preamble, vanishing swiftly into the sunset. Sighing, she offered a small prayer to Odin and then turned back to finish her rounds.

oOo

Hiccup was sitting in his hut, staring at the map he had nailed to the wall above his little desk, fingers laced together and shoulders tense. He had marked every contact on the map, every base they knew about and every scrap of intelligence he had gleaned over the past weeks. And he had sent Terror mails to Johann and any other contacts they had to see if there was any news about the Hunters' latest auction.

"Where are you?" he murmured. massaging the back of his neck and feeling the muscles aching from tension. "You can't hide from me, Viggo. Or you, Ryker…"

 _I wouldn't want to,_ Ryker sneered, his deep voice mocking and tightening Hiccup's muscles more. _We're waiting for you. Because we can take you any time, boy. And I won't be half as merciful as I was last time._

"I'm going to break you this time," Hiccup breathed. "I…"

"Son?"

He spun in his seat, rising so abruptly his metal leg slipped on the floorboards and made him overbalance: only the table behind him stopped him falling. Emerald eyes wide, his jaw dropped as he faced the shape filling the doorway.

"D-Dad?" he mouthed in shock. Stoick smiled and walked into the hut. "What-what are you doing here?" Walking closer, the big Chief inspected his son, cool eyes flicking over the dishevelled hair, the shadows under the green eyes, the fierce armour he wore even in his own hut. The alarming words from the letter rolled around his head but he knew he would have to be careful: Hiccup was smart and stubborn and would always deny any sort of problem.

"Can't a father just fly over to have a simple chat with his son?" he asked softly.

"No this father. Not a day long flight," Hiccup said suspiciously. "What's this about, Dad? Kinda busy here…"

"How are things going, son?" Stoick asked, pacing gently-meaning the floor was vibrating as his enormous bulk marched back and forth. His eyes trailed over the map as Hiccup tried to keep his body between his father and the wall. "Any…problems?"

"No! No! Everything's going just…swimmingly! The gang are happy, we're making good progress against Viggo and I think we've found a way to get Berk's gold back," Hiccup told him urgently. There was a pause as his father mulled over his words.

"You're trying to retrieve the gold?" he clarified, his piercing gaze impaling the lean and twitchy shape facing him. "And none of this is to do with making the Hunters pay for putting a bounty on you, for capturing and hurting you?" The young Dragon Rider stiffened, eyes narrowing.

"Of course not, Dad," he said very sharply and too quickly. Stoick reached the far wall, turned and paced back across the hut once more.

_Liar._

"There does seem to be some…concerns…" the Chief mused, his voice thoughtful. "Your friends are just that-friends. They aren't an army. They aren't here on a campaign or a raid. They follow you because they are your friends and they trust you. Do they still trust you, son? Do they even still like you?"

He knows. And they have told him how weak you are as a leader. What a failure you are.

"We've really made progress in destroying Viggo's ships and driving them back," Hiccup cut in, trying to silence the hissing voice. "We've disrupted his supply lines and though the last raid was tough, we pulled through."

_She pulled you through. You failed on every level._

"I think your friends are worried about you, son," Stoick told him slowly, standing a couple of feet from him. "I think they are concerned you're becoming…obsessed." His eyes saw the expression harden on the pale face. "I think so, too," he added. Staring up into the kindly expression, Hiccup stepped forward and forced a small smile onto his lips.

"I'm fine, Dad," he sighed. "I'm fine. I know you're worried, but I'm not going to do anything stupid. I've got information that there is an auction-and that would be a perfect opportunity to free the dragons, destroy ships and steal Viggo's resources. I can restore Berk's gold, stop the Hunters and repay them for what they've done in one fell swoop!"

_But not in that order._

"Are your friends behind you?" Stoick asked and Hiccup nodded urgently.

"Of-of course," he lied, eyes wide. "They understand what we're doing-and why. This is for Berk, Dad. Once this is done, we can relax and get back to normal…" Stoick stared at him for a long moment, eyes lingering on the taut shape and then he nodded.

"I trust you, son," he sighed. "I know you won't put your friends in danger. Gold can be replaced. Ships can be ambushed at a different time. But losing a friend…that cannot be undone. Be safe, Hiccup. You are my only child and I am very, very proud of you." He gave a small smile. "Once this is done, maybe you could come back to Berk and spend a few days…" Hiccup gave a relieved smile at the slightly wistful tone and led his father to the door.

"It's a promise, Dad," he said brightly. "Now, I know you are busy and can't waste time here. I promise I'll be careful and look after them. And if I need help in finishing Viggo, can I call on the A Team?" Stoick stared into the familiar face, seeing his son looking weary and anxious-and knowing Hiccup wasn't being truthful with him. His son was an abysmal liar, after all, even if Stoick didn't have over two decades of reading body language to determine truth and falsehood. But what could he do? Undermine Hiccup completely, destroy his authority and maybe shatter the good relationship they had or trust his bright, brave and determined son to do the right thing and find the answer?

He nodded. "Always remember I love you, son-and I am always there for you. Whether it's with use of the A Team, or advice or just someone to share concerns about Chiefing with. Be safe, son. I'll see you soon!" And then he stomped out, clambered back onto Skullcrusher and flew off without another word. Hiccup stared after him until he vanished into the late afternoon sky-and then he turned back to the Clubhouse, his eyes narrowed and face locked in a scowl of fury. His friends all looked up as he stalked in, his cold green gaze sweeping over them before he marched up to the calm shape of Astrid. Everyone fell silent as he glared scornfully at her.

"I never expected you to betray me," he hissed. Her blue eyes widened but she rose to face him, her expression determined.

"If anyone is betraying anything, it's you!" she told him firmly. "You were willing to let Tuff, Fish and Meatlug die on that raid."

"They didn't die," he told her angrily.

"No thanks to you!" she snapped back. "Not only did you leave them, you shouted at us for leaving our positions to save them. You're obsessed, Hiccup! And I couldn't let you kill us all because you haven't gotten over what happened!"

His fists clenched.

"You really have no idea what you're talking about!" he snapped. "You undermined my authority, you called my Dad to come and talk to me." Her jaw tightened, guessing Hiccup had fooled the Chief. "Yeah-he believed his son. How could he not? I'm the Pride of Berk, after all! But I can't trust you any more, Astrid. You can't cope with being put in your place. You can't follow orders. You can't support my leadership. You are disloyal." He lifted his chin. "Leave the Edge-now! I don't want you here. I don't want to see you again."

She stared at him and met his angry glare, before pulling back her fist and punching him in the face. There were a few sharp intakes of breath as he staggered and went down, clutching at his chin. She stood over him for a long moment, eyes blazing.

"If you let them get hurt, Hiccup, I will come back. And friend or not, I will stop you!" she swore and strode from the building. Shaking in shock, he stared after her, trying not to see the looks of shock and disgust from the others. Slowly, he got to his feet and glared at them.

"That goes for all of you," he snapped. "You're with me or you're my enemy!" And then he stalked out as well as the sounds of a Deadly Nadder taking off sounded faintly from their right. Fishlegs looked round the subdued group of Riders.

"So what do we do now?"


	7. Interception

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I KNOW Hiccup is extremely out of character: that's the whole point. I love the character of Hiccup because he is so positive, patient, determined and brave. But this is what happens when even that can't cope. He's been through a very traumatic experience and he's dealing with it really really badly. He's become obsessed, his old insecurities have resurfaced and he's not sleeping. He's also hallucinating because of lack of sleep and that really isn't helping. He is losing sight of what's right and wrong….but he still has Toothless so there is still hope. The others are reacting badly as well though they do try in this chapter and have to make a decision about what next. But there are still enough people who care about him to try to help him and prevent a disaster…if they get there in time…

**7: Interception**

Trader Johann was worried. He had been put in a very difficult position and though he was being asked to help a friend, there were a lot of things that didn't add up.

Of course, the fact that a small dragon-one from Berk-had arrived and persistently followed him around his ship had also been unnerving-until he had seen the note attached to its leg. Master Hiccup had taken great pains to explain about something he termed 'Terror mail'. And while Johann understood the Terror mentioned wasn't meant as a sort of threat but more a reference to the name of the type of small dragon, Johann still didn't feel comfortable with it eyeballing him. Of course, he would always put a brave face on when he visited Berk-because he did like and respect Chief Stoick and young Master Hiccup had saved Johann more than once but he still felt nervous around dragons-especially without one of the Riders around. But the dragon boredly flapped up and landed on top of Johann's head, sticking its leg out and inviting the trader to remove the message. With a sigh, Johann removed the parchment and peered at the runes, recognising Master Hiccup's hand. The young Viking was very direct, wanting to find out any news about the Hunters and a future auction of dragons-and Johann sighed. He dislodged the dragon, lashed the wheel and went below decks to have a sip of the exotic brandy he had acquired on his travels to the south and east.

 _Why me?_ Johann thought heavily. He was a pleasant man who generally got along with everyone, never cheated his customers and always treated everyone equably. He even traded with Outcasts and Berserkers before the Treaties but he was generally a man of peace and hated being embroiled in any conflict-though he knew the war between the Hooligans and the Hunters was serious. He had been very frightened when he had been used as a spy to find out about the previous auction because everyone knew the fierce reputation of Viggo Grimborn and no one wanted to cross him. Yet Trader Derek had already told Johann that there was going to be another Dragon Auction on Kaupmadur Island though he had been incredibly miffed that he had been warned away. And so had Trader Bertrand and Trader Graham.

Johann drained his glass and refilled it. They had found the brandy because they had gotten lost on an apparently routine trading run. And though he had enjoyed his wide travels when he had been a younger man, because travel broadened the mind and refilled the chest of anecdotes, much of the travelling had been uncomfortable and dangerous. Johann wasn't a coward but he was cautious and the non-existent navigational skills of his former partner, Erik the Brainless, had landed them in more trouble than he could recall. But this felt worse and very, very wrong-because Kaupmadur Island was a Trader Island-and yet the traders seemed to be excluded. Viggo's auctions were always very secret affairs yet Derek-who wasn't the sharpest axe in the armoury-knew all about it.

Viggo was clearly planning something bad.

The Trader peered across the table and saw the little dragon lick its eye. _How does he do that?_ Johann thought aimlessly. _And doesn't it sting?_ Then he shook his head. He had parchment and pen and knew he owed Master Hiccup a reply…but what could he write? Rumours had reached Johann's ears that the amiable young Dragon Rider had been changed by his encounter with the bounty hunters-most of which had willingly told their tales in various taverns. And all of them agreed that everyone had been hunting Hiccup Haddock-to be taken to Viggo alive for the leader of the Hunters to slay himself. And Hiccup had been treated very harshly by all of them, even though he had resisted all the way. But since…the rumours stated that the Riders had sunk ships, destroyed bases-and killed. Master Hiccup was clearly after revenge for his wounds…and Johann was stuck in the middle.

_I wonder if Master Fishlegs…or even Miss Astrid…approves?_

But he owed Master Hiccup his life-and he had to trust that the patient, kind young man would do the right thing-by his friends as well as the Hunters. So he scribbled a short note that revealed what he knew about the location and timing of the auction. He swallowed and fastened it to the leg of the small dragon. It chirped, rubbed against his hand and then flapped up through the hatch and into the sky. Johann sighed: he had made his choice. Rising, he drained his glass and then headed for the wheel. He had told Hiccup where the auction was-but there was someone else he needed to speak with.

Urgently, he set course for Berk.

oOo

Hiccup scarcely glanced up as he trudged along to the Clubhouse. Johann's note had given him a jolt because the timescale was pretty short and he had a lot of reconnaissance to complete. Johann had explained the island was difficult to access and it certainly wasn't on most maps so he was determined to run a test run tonight. He sighed and paused, staring into the sunset, the Night Fury walking at his back. Toothless was crooning worriedly at him and he paused to half-turn and rub the proffered nose.

"I know, bud," he murmured. "But if I go tonight, I may end up tired enough to sleep." Toothless nuzzled against his body and he stilled, resting his head against the dragon's. "Yeah-I know I keep you awake too-but whenever I try to rest, I just see…him. I'm sorry, bud," he sighed. "I know it's not much fun for you. You deserve better. And once Viggo is defeated, we can go searching for new dragons-just you and me."

Toothless gave a small warble, licking Hiccup's cheek gently.

"No, I doubt anyone will be with me then-except you…" he murmured and then turned away. "Let's get something to eat-and then we can scout out this island…" Tiredly, he walked along the walkway until he reached the Clubhouse and strode in, barely noticing that the others were all there-until they closed the door behind him.

Instantly, he was on high alert, pupils wide and muscles tense. His head snapped round and breathing accelerated as he faced his friends. Toothless sat in the doorway, watching Hiccup with sad green eyes, as Fishlegs rose and gestured to a seat surrounded by a loose circle of chairs.

"Please-take a seat," the husky young man invited Hiccup and instinctively, the leader of the Riders backed away, his hand hovering by the sword on his hip.

"What in Thor's name is this?" he asked, his tone hard, though the pulse was bounding in his neck.

"Sit down, Hiccup," Heather told him gently. "This is an intervention." He stared at her.

"A…what?' he asked incredulously.

"Please," Fishlegs repeated. "Hiccup. We're your friends. We're all worried about you. At least, hear us out…" Breathing hard, Hiccup's left hand twitched and he almost snatched for his sword but the guy facing him was Fishlegs, a man who almost never got angry and who was genuinely kind and gentle. Toothless was sitting happily behind him and the others were watching him suspiciously. With a conscious effort, he moved his hand away from his sword and walked to the chair, sitting stiffly and staring at his fellow Riders.

"Okay," he said tonelessly. "Fire away." Fishlegs stared at him, his eyes wide and round with shock. To be honest, the Riders were surprised that they had made it this far and they all shared a variety of glances before Fishlegs and Heather took their seats. The Gronckle rider cleared his throat and stared into Hiccup's guarded emerald gaze, the folded arms and expressionless face not encouraging.

"Hiccup," he began, "we are all worried about you…"

"You already said that," Hiccup pointed out dryly.

"…and we know you suffered a terrible ordeal at the hands of those bounty hunters…"

_He doesn't know, does he? What will they say if you told them? Would they reject you like the traitor you are?_

"…and we all saw how badly you were hurt and that you nearly died when Ryker stabbed you. But we are so worried because you changed after that. You were very mean to us all, when we tried to help you."

"You were especially cruel to Astrid, who did everything you asked her…" Heather began but he jerked to his feet.

"I am NOT discussing Astrid!" he snapped.

"Sit down!" Snotlout said firmly. "You're gonna listen to us for now," For a long moment, the stocky dragon rider looked into his cousin's eyes and Hiccup reluctantly sat down, his arms folded and expression hostile. The only reason why he was still sitting there was because he knew he needed the other Riders to bring Viggo down…and because there was still a corner of him that regretted how he was behaving, even though he had wrestled with his conscience, night after night, crushing every objection because he had the greater good to consider.

"You have been cruel, dismissive and cold to all of us," Snotlout said harshly. "And though we know we mess around, we do it because we are all friends. But you aren't…not any more."

Hiccup stiffened: he couldn't help it.

_You see? They've realised just how weak and useless you are!_

"H-we came with you because it was fun," Tuff told him. "We're all your friends and we have fought beside each other and saved each other so many times! And we all came to save you when those bounty hunters had you because we are your friends."

"But when you got back, you treated us like…nothing," Ruff said, her voice softer than normal. "You didn't treat us like friends but rather like…idiots."

"You shouted at us and blamed us for doing what we always do-what you always tell us to do!" Fishlegs protested. "Look-we don't mind drilling. We've been drilling for years! And we'll try to do what you want us to-but you're always patient with us-even when the twins are having a joke or Snotlout is ignoring you. But shouting at us for not doing what you want when you don't even tell us what you want is…horrible."

"None of us signed up to be in your personal Dragon Rider army," Snotlout reminded him snarkily. Heather made a shushing gesture.

"We follow you because we want to," she told him. "Because we all believe in what you showed us about dragons: that they are kind, gentle amazing creatures. But you…aren't. Not any more. And on the last raid, you forgot to rescue the dragons. It was only…" She chewed her lip. "The rest of us who remembered the point of the exercise."

_You see? You can't trust them. They see through you…_

"Hiccup-you are the kindest, most caring and bravest of all of us," Fishlegs said. "You love dragons. But you forgot to rescue them. You left three of our group-two vikings, one dragon-to be killed by the Hunters!"

The auburn-haired Viking blushed then, his eyes downcast: he did feel ashamed, shocked at how his obsession had almost lost him two of his friends and Meatlug, the gentlest of all the dragons. "Yeah…I'm sorry…" he mumbled, his hands clasped tightly. "I-I…"

"Hiccup…we get that you had a horrible time," Snotlout said through gritted teeth. "But…"

"If you are having issues still, talk to us," Ruff said surprisingly. "You've been there for all of us, no matter what happened. You've saved all our lives. Most of us have saved you or helped save you a few times as well. We've been trapped, snowed in, frozen, baked, marooned, blown up…and we always pull through-together."

"I agree with my sis," Tuff added. "H-we know something's happened. You're being someone you're not-and not someone we really like. And I don't think I can trust you right now."

"Me neither," Snotlout added. "Our Hiccup talks to us. He explains his plans. He includes us in the mission. We're not arrow fodder: we're your friends. And if we have to decide to protect our dragons from you, we will!"

"Talk to us, Hiccup!" Heather almost pleaded. "Look-I know all about pain. I spent too long alone, allowing it to fester as I sought revenge on Dagur for the death of my parents. I hurt too many innocents because I was looking for him to kill him. And without you, I would've succeeded-and I would have slain my own brother!" She paused. "It was your determination, your compassion and humanity that stopped me committing a heinous crime." She swallowed. "And he repaid us by saving all our lives." She took a shuddering breath. "You've done the opposite, Hiccup. You've turned from Hiccup into the same heartless, ruthless soldier who would kill us all to complete his quest."

"We miss you sitting and laughing and joking with us!" Ruff admitted.

"I miss you playing Maces and Talons with me-and talking about dragons and helping me decipher the DragonEye notes," Fishlegs sighed.

"I actually miss your spiced fish stew," Snotlout piped up unexpectedly. "You don't join in any of the duties of the Edge any more. When the twins found that Claim Stone and we all agreed to help them in return for all being equal owners of the Edge, you said that the island belonged to all of us. But you're acting like it's all your domain and aren't doing anything any more!"

"We're not going anywhere until you talk to us, Hiccup," Fishlegs said determinedly. "We're your friends-but we can't follow you. Not now."

Hiccup stared round the semicircle of Vikings and dug his hands into his hair, running his fingers through until he met a snag: the small braids that Astrid had made. His eyes snapped open and he had to crush the instinctive response.

"Mutiny?" he murmured. Then he shook his head. "Guys…I know you mean well…"

"Hiccup-this is important," Heather insisted and he nodded.

"I know," he admitted. "Thor-I know. And…you're right. I am struggling because it was horrible being so weak that everyone captured me, that I could never get away…so I had to become stronger. And maybe…maybe I overdid it…and I am sorry, guys…" He swallowed and lifted his emerald eyes, blinking. "But I have to do this. Gods, I will never have a second of peace until I know Viggo and Ryker have paid for what they've done. We have to weaken them, so we have a chance to drive them back." He ran his left hand through his hair again.

"You think we're following you on another crazy mission…" Snotlout grumped angrily but Hiccup stared hard at him.

"He's having another auction," he said abruptly. "Berk is suffering. And taking the gold back would undermine his ability to trade. We can strike a blow back and teach him that we're not weak, that he has failed!"

"But Hiccup…you left some of us to die," Fishlegs told him softly. Chewing his lip, the auburn-haired viking nodded ashamedly.

"And I am so sorry," he said. "I swear I will explain everything once we've finished this mission. I promise." They all looked sceptically at him. He sighed. "I'm just about holding it together," he explained softly, ignoring the menacing chuckle that only he could hear. "If I start concentrating on what happened, I will be worse than useless…" He took a shaking breath, a frisson of fear and shame running through him at even speaking the word that had defined much of his younger life. "I need you to help me. I need my friends to help me. I need…I need to hit that auction, free those dragons and take the gold back!" His emerald eyes looked at them pleadingly. "I need you guys. Please…it's the only way we can be safe…"

"You know where this auction is?" Heather asked suspiciously. He nodded.

"Johann has found out for me," he admitted. "He sent me a Terror. But…but I can't go and reconnoitre because there are still bounty hunters looking for me." He bowed his head. "But all the Traders know." Snotlout looked round and snorted.

"And all six of us will manage to end all of those Hunters on our own?" he scoffed. "Look we're missing our best fighter-and don't pretend you can't bear to talk about her, Hiccup. You were completely shitty to her and it wasn't fair. She reached out to you, over and over and you just crushed her."

"She was leaving anyway," Heather told him sharply. He stared at her, anger and shame warring in his heart. He hadn't known that-but he should have guessed. Astrid was a proud, fearless warrior who had endured more than he could have imagined in order to stay with Hiccup and try to help him. "But Snot has a point. There are so few of us against so many!"

"My Dad has said we can call on the A Team," he said. "And I've already sent for them. But I need you. Berk needs you." he paused. "And I won't let you down. I won't let anything happen to you." The Riders shared a look and the male twin glanced up.

"T? Is he telling the truth? Can we trust him?" he asked the Night Fury. Hiccup gaped at the twin and then his head snapped round to inspect his dragon. Toothless had a distinctly thoughtful look on his face and he looked at his Rider for a long time before-almost reluctantly-he nodded.

"Not exactly a ringing endorsement, brother," Ruff commented. Tuff sighed.

"But I trust T," he sighed. Snotlout nodded, his expression grim.

"Astrid would," he said obviously, staring challengingly into Hiccup's eyes. "She never let us down." Heather nodded.

"We will hold you to our promise," she said. "And if anything happens to a single one of us, Hiccup-every one of us will hunt you down and make you pay for it. We're trusting you with our lives and our dragons. Don't betray that trust." Hiccup rose shakily.

"I won't."

_Liar._

"Get some rest," he advised them. "The A Team will arrive later on. And the raid is tomorrow night. We'll need to double up on accommodations…and we'll go over the plan once everyone is here. And again in the morning-until we all know our tasks and the plan backwards, forwards and sideways." He offered a very wan smile and Heather and Fishlegs rose, both resting a hand on his armoured shoulders.

"Glad to have you back," they said genuinely. The twins were grinning but Snotlout was still scowling suspiciously as Hiccup nodded and headed for the door. Toothless helped him push it open and followed him out onto the walkway-until he stopped and rested back against the wall of the nearest hut, breathing hard and staring up at the evening sky. His heart was fluttering in his chest and he could feel a wave of panic rising through his chest which he struggled to crush.

 _They saw right through you,_ Ryker sneered at him. _You were pathetic. They saw your weakness. They preferred the loser. They don't trust you._

"They will," he sighed, closing his eyes. _They will. No matter what it takes._

And then he headed back to his hut, the Night Fury walking protectively this back. Toothless knew that his friend still wasn't right, was still listening to a voice no one else could hear: a voice that tore at Hiccup, piece by piece, that denied him sleep and peace and hope. And Toothless knew that Hiccup had lied but he had protected his human brother anyway. But even he wasn't prepared for the outburst of fury as the door to Hiccup's hut slammed down. Alone in his hut, the young Viking gave a blood-curdling scream of incoherent rage.

"Those godless mutinous treacherous sons of trolls!" he shouted, flinging his sword into the wall and kicking over his stool. "Odin-give me strength! But I need them. Gods, I need them! How pathetic is that? How weak is that? Until I have Viggo and Ryker beaten-and then…it's just us, bud. Beyond that…there's nothing left. No one will ever trust us again."

Toothless crooned and lay down, his ear-flaps back and eyes miserable. The person facing him wasn't the same boy he had befriended in the cove, the small Viking who had spared his life and given him back the ability to fly. And though he looked and smelled the same…he didn't sound the same. And Toothless was worried because he wasn't sure how far he could trust this stranger either.

"They want me to talk," he said in a calmer voice, though there was a sudden edge of despair. His shoulders sagged and his hands trembled. "They think that will help. But we both know it won't."

_Because then they will know how despicable you are, Ryker sneered and the young Viking sagged, flinching at the words._

"What hope did I have?" he sighed. "It was the end. I had nothing left to give."

 _I don't know-you were very helpful,_ Ryker reminded him. _Almost worthy of a Grimborn._

Toothless whimpered and covered his face with his front paws. He could sense his Rider's darkening mood-but the sound managed to snap Hiccup back to the present for a moment. Breathing hard, the Rider stared at him and sighed, still breathing hard, before he ripped out his knife. For a moment he stared at the mournful Night Fury-and then the knife flashed.

Two small auburn braids floated free, dropping discarded to the floor as Hiccup turned back to his plans.


	8. Set Piece

**8: Set Piece**

"Is everything ready?"

Ryker smirked, his cruel eyes already cold with anticipation at getting his hands on the young Viking once more. On this occasion, he would have much more time to wreak his vengeance on Hiccup Haddock… Viggo cleared his throat and his older brother dragged his attention back to the present.

"Yes," he said gruffly. "We had to let a couple of Traders join in-though they add to the illusion."

"Which?" Viggo asked coldly, an eyebrow arching. Ryder chuckled.

"Trader Derek…"

"The idiot with the seven foot beard?" Viggo's eyes rolled.

"And Trader Ivan." Ryker gave a low chuckle at the name and his brother looked quizzically. "The bald lunatic who threatens anyone with an axe who doesn't agree to his terms of the trade." Viggo's eyes narrowed. "It is going to convince anyone infiltrating the auction that it's genuine…" Viggo pinched the bridge of his nose.

"It is genuine," he sighed, revealing the situation to his brother. "Losses have been catastrophic. Our partners to the East are getting impatient at the delays in delivery of the merchandise so I have needed to call in our more amenable customers to sell some of our more attractive lots in order to recoup some capitol so we can finance more ships."

"And there will be the dragons from the Riders to sell," Ryker reminded him. "A Night Fury should fetch its weight in gold." Viggo nodded, inspecting his notes.

"I hope so," he said coolly, "because half the Vikings are coming to see the dragon captured and immediately sold." Ryder grinned.

"Don't worry, brother," he said darkly. "We both know this isn't the Hiccup Haddock who was such a thorn in your side. This version is far more predictable-and beatable!" Viggo inspected his older brother thoughtfully. Recently, Ryker had been challenging his commands and taking initiatives that Viggo hadn't authorised or approved of. The younger brother knew his sibling was violent, sadistic and cruel-and had fixated on the young viking who had defied and humiliated him so many times previously. Whatever Ryker had done to Hiccup had certainly broken the boy-at least partially. But in Viggo's opinion, this Hiccup may lack the compassion and unpredictability of the old one-but he was more brutal and callous-which was still a danger. Hiccup's friends had always been a reliable weakness: the survivors from the last skirmish had indicated he had been prepared to leave them to die if it meant achieving his goals. And that meant there was a possibility Viggo was facing a man as intelligent as himself-now armed with equal ruthlessness. The prospect was not appetising.

"We shall see," the leader of the Hunters said quietly, watching his brother roll his eyes and scoff. "We shall see."

oOo

"Is everything ready?"

The assembled Riders nodded, collected around the table in the Clubhouse, running through the final time before they left for the mission.

"All the dragons are fed and ready to fly," Fishlegs reported.

"We have plenty of containers of Monstrous Nightmare gel and Zippleback gas loaded in our packs," Snotlout admitted.

"Run through-by the numbers," Hiccup commanded, his green gaze sweeping over the assembled Riders.

"Group one flies in low from the south," Heather began.

"We launch a distracting run to attack the ships moored in the harbour," Ruff added.

"And we'll draw the fire," Tuff added. "Awesome!" Bucket and Mulch nodded-well, Mulch did and Bucket did when his short hairy friend, Mulch swatted his shoulder to remind him to agree. Heather frowned.

"And then, once we've met some resistance, we peel away and retreat," she reminded them.

"Group two will have entered from the north and come in silently through the darkness," Gustav added, his tone serious. The younger teen was now sixteen and had led his own team for a few months now. The increase in responsibility and consequent closer working relationship with the Chief had made the boy grow up fast. No longer just focussed on his own desires and messing around with Fanghook, Gustav was becoming a responsible and daring leader, though he still looked up to Hiccup.

"We will start to free the dragons and ensure they get away safely," Fishlegs added. Gothi nodded, her expression determined. She had recently adopted a pair of Terrible Terrors along with her Gronckle and hated the idea of any dragons being imprisoned or sold as merchandise.

"Group three-the awesome Jorgensen group-will infiltrate the merchants and head for the gold," Snotlout added. Spitelout, his father who was rather more self-confident and dumber-grinned.

"Job's good as done!" he added.

"Group one comes round again and repeats the attack," Heather added.

"And I remain on point, assisting where required," Hiccup added. "Once the dragons are away and the gold secured, we sink the remaining ships and leave Viggo and Ryker to explain to their customers what happened."

"And the gold goes back to Berk," Snotlout finished.

There was a pause and Hiccup took a shuddering breath. "Take care," he said. "Stick to your part of the plan and it will run smoothly." Snotlout cast him a jaundiced look before nodding. "Everyone-grab your supplies. We fly out in half an hour!" There were murmurs and then the group scattered, fetching food and fish for the dragons while Hiccup made his way back to his hut, ensuring he had spare cartridges for his Inferno. But once he was in his hut, he slid down the wall, his hands digging anxiously into his auburn hair. The fingers ran easily through the locks, no longer meeting the resistance of Astrid's braids. Emerald eyes snapped wide and he cast around the room, seeing the two little discarded braids-and immediately, he crawled over to snag them in his hand, curling it into a fist and pressing it against his forehead. He curled forward in despair, his eyes screwed closed.

"Astrid," he whispered. "I am so sorry. But-but I had to do it. I had to drive you away…so you, at least, are safe. No matter what happens, you won't be there. So when it all goes wrong, I will know I've done one last thing for you. You will live. And maybe you can look after whoever else survives."

_Because I won't. I don't deserve to._

A dry sob shuddered through him and an image of Astrid flickered across his memory: Astrid so pale and sick with the Scourge of Odin, her shape limp and weak in his arms.

_I can't imagine a world without you._

"But I've made myself one," he whispered as Toothless crooned and shuffled closer. "And it's like Helheim. Gods, I need you, every minute of every hour. I need my friend. I need Astrid…but this is the only way can protect you. Ryder and Viggo won't target you because they won't believe you mean anything to me. Ryder won't take you and kill you in front of me." Toothless wrapped his wings around the hunched shape, crooning softly. Hiccup took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, bud," he sighed. "I can't do this any more. I can't be this person…but I must. Because if I let them win again, I have just proved that Ryker is right." He leaned against the dragon. "And we have to finish this. No matter what it costs."

"Are you ready?" came the shout from outside and Hiccup palmed his face dry as the dragon pulled back. Slowly, he opened his hand and stared at the little braids-then very deliberately, he slid them under his tunic, close to his heart. He flashed the slightest smile to his dragon, then dragged his helmet on, checked his weapons and swung into the saddle.

"Come on, bud," he said tonelessly. "Time to go."

oOo

Darkness had fallen but Kaupmadur island was brightly lit with torches and bonfires as the customers investigated the stalls, viewed the lots and gathered in small groups, discussing the prospective sale. Viggo and Ryker were in Viggo's tent, armed and waiting to start the auction. Ryder was pacing back and forth, to the amusement of his brother.

"He'll come," Viggo assured him, sipping his ale. "You'll have your fun soon enough!"

"I want him finished!" Ryder growled. "How can we plan and conduct business when that boy keeps raiding us?" Viggo rose, adjusting his sword.

"I can plan and conduct business fine-but we need his dragon," Viggo said. "Get to your place and be ready." The Grimborn brothers strode out into the night-unconscious of the silently hovering shape, concealed by the dark. Hiccup peered from behind his mask and watched the two disguised shapes sneak closer, eyeballing the two Hunter guards who guarded the tent. And then the young Rider snapped his head up as he heard the faintest whisk of wings as the Riders of Group One approached.

The twins were serious, game faces on for once and axes clamped into their fists as Barf spewed a huge trail of gas as they swooped past the line of moored vessels. Bucket and Mulch followed, adding another line of gas the billowed around the ships. The skeleton crews glance up in utter shock as the green fog surrounded them and there was a sudden movement as they dived for cover as Heather zoomed by. As they peeled away, Windshear coughed a large enough ball of fire to ignite the gas. The ensuing explosion covered half the harbour and set most of the ships on fire. There were shouts and half the crowd surged forward to help the struggling sailors while the purchasers hung back, muttering amongst themselves and casting pitying and scornful glances towards Viggo.

Quietly at the back of the settlement, three shapes sneaked to the cages, avoiding the patrolling Hunters. Gustav hung back, his quick grey eyes seeing a roving patrol and waving Fishlegs and Gothi to stand back. All three pressed into the shadows until they passed and then the youngest Rider sped forward, swiftly unlatching the cages. Fishlegs and the Elder chased the dragons out into the darkness as Gustav watched, checking where the next targets were. Once they were back, Fishlegs sent Gothi back to her Gronckle Rockface to help Meatlug shepherd the released dragons away as he and Gustav headed for the next bank of cages.

Snotlout and Spitelout sneaked towards Viggo's tent, sticking to the shadows as much as they could, swathed in good quality cloaks that suggested they were merchants of means. Hiccup had given them orders to be quiet and stealthy-but Spitelout was taking as much notice of the young Viking leader as he did of anyone.

"Stand aside, boyo," he said with ill-advised overconfidence. "Watch how a real Viking deals with these pansy Hunters!" Snotlout grimaced.

"Dad-I really think you oughtta stick to the plan!" he hissed. Not that he was that afraid of Hiccup yelling at him-though Snotlout hated being humiliated by his cousin in front of the other Riders-but even Snotlout could appreciate that they needed stealth when infiltrating a heavily guarded Hunter auction. Spitelout leered at his son.

"Ye don't need ta listen ta that twig, boyo!" he told his son unwisely. "Listen ta yer old man! I've been doing this long before you were born!"

 _Says the man who goes down to the docks and gets hit over the head with a bludgeon for fun,_ Snotlout thought irritably. He knew he was the senior rider and his father should listen to him-or at least to the plan, which was made by Hiccup who was definitely the most senior dragon rider…but of course, Spitelout knew better.

"Dad-please just wait until…" Snotlout suggested.

"SPITELOUT! SPITELOUT! OI! OI! OI!" his father screamed and charged the guards.

"That's MY war cry!" Snotlout grumbled and raced after him-because watching his father get slaughtered really wasn't an option-even when half a dozen more Hunters burst from the tent and engaged the two Jorgensens. And Snotlout knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that this was a trap…as they had all suspected, which was why Hiccup had ordered diversion, stealth and circumspection.

 _Except my father can't even say that, let alone understand what it means,_ he sighed as he attacked the nearest Hunter. _Gods, I wish Astrid was here._

Overhead, Hiccup saw the ambush he had expected and gave a thin smile behind his mask, motioning the Night Fury to stealthily land behind the tent, deep in the shadows. Lithely, he slid off the saddle and grasped Inferno, then snapped it open and slashed the flaming blade through the thick leather of the tent. As expected it parted like yak butter and he erupted into the tent, finding a single remaining guard that he clubbed over the back of the head with the hilt of his sword. Then he saw it: the chest. Breathing hard, he approached it and warily snapped it open-to face a chest full of gold coins-tiny but between them…enough to ease Berk's woes and salvage something from the disaster. He snapped the lid closed and grabbed the chest, whistling Toothless who barged in and allowed Hiccup to lash the chest to his saddle.

"Come on, bud-we've got what we came for," Hiccup murmured, clipping his foot back into the control pedal. He almost turned back the way he came-but he heard the sounds of battle and Spitelout cursing floridly. He sighed: Ryker would have run, leaving his men without hesitation. _But I am not Ryker and trying to be Ryker is killing me. It cost me Astrid: I can't afford to give him any more._ He patted the Night Fury. "Shall we help our friends?"

Toothless let out a roar that alerted Hookfang and Spineguard, Spitelout's Nadder. Instantly,t he dragons charged forward as Hiccup and Toothless burst through the entrance, batting the Hunters aside and pointing the Jorgensens to their dragons. Snotlout stared at him in shock.

"What are you doing here?" he asked in a suspicious voice.

"Stealing the gold," Hiccup told him bluntly. "Now help Fish, Gustav and Gothi free those dragons. And for the Gods's sake-stick to the damned plan!" Before Snotlout could even draw another breath, they had bounded past and were already arrowing up. Spitelout knocked the last Hunter out.

"Did he just use us as a decoy?" he asked in a grim voice. Snotlout nodded, grasping Hookfang's horns and swinging into the saddle.

"Yes," he said angrily. "Come on-we gotta get the others out of here. This whole auction is a trap!"

Fishlegs and Gustav saw the movement of guards, closing on the cages and both backed away-but there were steps behind them. In a panic, they ducked under the covers of a cage-and found themselves facing four guards, who were hiding in an unlocked cage. Fishlegs offered a tiny wave.

"Um…hi?" he tried as the Hunters tried to grab at them. Gustav was more practical, grabbing Fishlegs's arm and shouting 'RUN!' The two sped away, guards racing at them from all sides. Gustav whistled through his teeth and the adolescent Monstrous Nightmare that was curled discreetly behind the furthest cage erupted forward, flaming ferociously. Gustav pushed Fishlegs to the ground as Fanghook blasted flames at the pursuing Hunters, the heat burning hairs on the back of both young Vikings's necks. But Gustav was up in a second, grabbing the husky Rider and sprinting away from the Hunters.

Viggo and Ryker watched from the auction lectern, seeing Hunters swarm forward from every quarter, all disguises being discarded as their men closed the noose on the infiltrators. Ryker roared and nets flew at the fleeing Riders as Gustav almost reached Fanghook. Spitelout and Snotlout both went down, tangled in the dragon-proof nets while Fishlegs dodged and continued running through the dispersing crowds. He barged a Hunter aside and then came face to face with a trio of armed men.

"Oh Thor," he squeaked as another shape burst forward, axe swinging fiercely and cutting them down without hesitation. Astrid knocked the hood of her cloak back and stared into his shocked face.

"Get to Meatlug!" she commanded him, blue eyes glittering. "We'll take it from here!"

"We?" he yelped and then gaped as the unmistakeable shape of a Rumblehorn shot over the cages, a blast of fire driving the Hunters back from the trapped Gustav and Fanghook. Instantly, the youngest Rider scrambled into the saddle.

"FIRE IT UP!" he yelled and the dragon burst into flames, tossing the net away and ripping the two nearest cages open. But as he began to climb, he was hit by another net and slammed into the ground again. "Owww…" he protested. "This is getting old, fast!"

Out on the harbour, the first group were circling round for the second pass, though most of the ships were already in flames. Heather directed her team to the west end of the harbour, where there was the least damage and the Zipplebacks swooped by once more, another huge cloud of gas swirling around the ships. Heather was hanging back to ignite the gas-so she saw the nets spiralling up, swathing both of the Zipplebacks. A trio of nets wrapped around Windshear and she grabbed her axe, clanging at the strengthened nets, but they held as she plummeted to the ground, a group of Hunters already racing towards her and the thrashing Razorwhip.

But behind her, the ships exploded, a shot coming in from the darkness igniting the dense cloud of gas-and Heather could dimly see a lumpy shape flying quite slowly against the dark night-and slamming straight through the catapults as if they didn't exist, the club-like tail of the dragon barrelling through everything in its way.

"Coming through!" a voice shouted cheerily as the lumpy dragon circled around and knocked out another half dozen hunters. With a grunt, Heather managed to lever the first net up enough for Windshear to scuttle round and try to toss the trap aside-but they remained swathed in dragon-proof metal links. Gobber landed beside her, a grin cracking his big face, his hook hand replaced by a very lethal looking axe. His lumpy brown dragon, his Hotburple, Grump, immediately lay down and the blacksmith kicked him. "Come on, Grump. Have away. This is what you're good at!" And there was a pause before the slow, sleepy-looking dragon reluctantly lumbered to his feet and proceeded to bite swiftly through the nets, allowing Windshear to urgently shake them off. Heather gaped as the pair. "Hello, lass," Gobber added. "Shall we free the others?"

Heather stared at him in utter shock, her eyes sweeping over him. "How are you here?" she asked, swinging into the saddle. "How did you even know we were here?" Gobber grinned, almost decapitating himself as he tried to scratch his chin with his axe.

"Trader Johann was worried-so he sailed to Berk and insisted on speaking to Astrid," he admitted. "Then the lass called Stoick and I and we headed here early. Because it was clearly a trap!" Heather nodded: she could hear the twins cursing and Bucket asking Mulch if he was scared too. Then they heard the twins counting and the sounds of explosions as they began to lob Zippleback gas canisters at the approaching guards followed by self-igniting Monstrous Nightmare gel capsules. The resulting chaos enabled the Thorstons to get the nets off their dragon-and rescue the less experienced Zippleback and its riders as well.

"We need to get out of here," she said firmly. "This is a death-trap!" Gobber nodded.

"Lead on, lass!" he grinned.

Snotlout was mouthing every curse he could think of as he was dragged from Hookfang, hearing his father add a few new variations he had yet to think of as he was manhandled off his Nadder. But the object of his curses was the masked, armoured young man on the Night Fury, who had led them into this trap and sacrificed them just to allow Hiccup to satisfy whatever agenda he deemed important. Snotlout now knew his cousin had lied to them just to persuade them to help him on this crazy mission. He had used him and his Dad as decoys and had vanished, leaving them as sacrifices to Viggo.

"Thor-if there is any justice in this Realm, make Hiccup pay for what he's done," he growled as the familiar whistle sounded, accelerating closer. Snotlout stared up in shock as Toothless fired a massive plasma bolt that tossed the Hunters aside and dived down, ripping the nets away from the imprisoned dragons and Riders. Leaning low over the Night Fury's neck, Hiccup glanced at his cousin and Uncle.

"Get back!" he yelled. "Retreat!"

"No need to tell us twice!" Spitelout called, scrambling into the saddle and flying away as fast as he could-but Snotlout paused, staring after Hiccup as their leader circled round, then flipped and headed down for the arena that was being used for the auction. Over the harbour, most of the ships were on fire and half of them were sinking, disabling Viggo's capacity. And he knew Hiccup had the gold. He leapt into the saddle and kicked Hookfang into the air after his Dad, seeing the Chief zooming overhead, firing fiercely at any catapult or ballista that threatened his fellow Riders. Snotlout instantly flew over to his Uncle.

"Sir? What's happening?" he asked. Stoick looked across at him, his cool eyes scanning the sky frantically.

"Johann warned us," he said. "And Astrid came up with the plan. She knew what Hiccup would do-and worked out what trap Viggo would set." He paused. "And she was right on both counts."

"Sir-there's something very wrong with Hiccup," Snotlout said, dodging a rock fired from a catapult. Behind them, Meatlug caught it and swiftly ate it. "I don't know what he said to you but Astrid was right. You have to do something to stop him!" The whistle of a Night Fury speeding by had both men snap their heads up as the sleek shape zoomed low over the burning fleet and blew up Viggo's tent, then flipped round in a tight turn to head towards the arena.

Hiccup's eyes focussed on the shapes of Viggo and Ryker, standing amid the chaos. Their ships were burning, the gold was lashed to Toothless and the dragons were being released. So why did he feel so unsatisfied?

 _Because I'm watching you,_ Ryker said scornfully. _Because no matter what you do, I will still be here-and one day, I will get my hands on you once more…_

His hands tightened so his knuckles showed white as he gripped the saddle and he glanced over to check the Riders were away. Until they had left the Edge, he had tried to squash any feeling he had for them, tried to erase them from his thinking and be free of distractions, cold and clear and calm-like Viggo. Who Hiccup had been was too weak, too vulnerable to defeat the leader of the Hunters-even if it had meant destroying who he was-and shattering his heart. But that last moment, his facade had cracked and he couldn't deny what his nightmares and the shade of Ryker had kept telling him: he wasn't strong enough to abandon them. He knew this was likely a suicide mission…but he couldn't abandon them to die. And that meant the sacrifice, the death had to be…

"I'm sorry, bud," he murmured softly. "They have to get away. They have to survive…but that means someone has to keep the Hunters busy so they and the captured dragons can escape." He blinked. "I wanted to set you free," he whispered. "But in the end, if we have to die for them, if we have to be the price for getting them away and stopping Viggo…it's what I owe." He stroked the flattened head. "I betrayed them, bud," he whispered. "I'm done."

But Toothless pulled up, fighting furiously as Hiccup tried to drive him on. A brace of razor-sharp nets missed them by inches but Hiccup stamped his foot down, forcing them to fall from he sky.

"We have to do this," he said more firmly, feeling the pressure of the severed little braids against his skin as he shifted. "I know you can see the missiles coming in-but we have to stop them now…"

Toothless gave a small croon, nudging Hiccup's leg with the chest and he groaned: he still had the gold. Then he heard a familiar roar and his head snapped round to see his father on Skullcrusher, firing at a trio of Hunters who were firing Dragon Root arrows at the Rumblehorn. And though Hiccup doubted the arrows would even be able to penetrate the armoured dragon's hide, he found himself flipping round and firing a medium plasma blast that blasted the arrows away from his father, before hanging in the air before his father. He flipped his mask up, green eyes shocked and confused.

"Dad? What on Midgard are you doing here?" he asked in shock. Stoick scowled.

"Son-we need to talk!" he said sternly. "I think you weren't entirely honest with me when we spoke and…"

"REALLY? You want to talk about this NOW?" Hiccup shouted at him. "In Odin's name-get them away from here. I'm going to stop them, once and for all!"

"Son, I forbid…" the Chief began but Hiccup shook his head.

"Dad-get them out of here," he said in a toneless voice. "Keep them safe." He turned away, snapping his mask down. "I have to do this…"

"SON!" Stoick shouted as he saw Hiccup fighting Toothless, again, collapsing the tail and forcing the dragon to spread his wings to glide them down. The Zipplebacks and Heather were swooping round, his brother and nephew were already at his side and Fishlegs and Gothi were shepherding away all of the freed dragons. The Monstrous Nightmares were laying down a steady barrage of flames, helped by Skullcrusher and Spineguard but his son was flying into the densest of the firefight with no one at his side. His gaze was entirely focussed on the arena and the Grimborn brothers…

A blast of fire just missed his head and he rolled-avoiding a tightly packed score of arrows fired from a ballista. Astrid glared up at him and he started, shame and anger warring in his chest. He was so close to the end…but she had just saved him…again. He waved her away.

"HICCUP!" she shouted. "It's too dense in there. They all have Dragon Root arrows! You'll never make it!"

"It doesn't matter!" he shouted back at her. "If they die, it doesn't matter what happens to me…"

"And Toothless?" she yelled at him. "You can't condemn him as well…"

"I messed up so many times, Astrid-I have to do this…"

Her blue eyes showed fear and concern for him. No matter how he had treated her, she still cared. Damn that Hofferson stubbornness. And then she screamed as a net wrapped resolutely around the Nadder and she began to drop from the sky, pinwheeling end over end towards the arena…and the Grimborns. And he could do it, for every eye was on Astrid: the girl he loved and who still cared for him, no matter how much of an ass he was. He just needed to accelerate, to fire the plasma blast and vaporise Viggo and especially Ryker and soar up, never stopping to look at the girl who would pay the price for his obsession and victory. And it would make dragonkind safer, would save hundreds of reptilian lives…

…at the cost of the one person who he couldn't imagine a world without…

_…he could be responsible for the world without Astrid…_

He screamed and grabbed the chest, ripping it from the saddle and flinging it sideways, the lid bursting open and scattering the gold across the arena, the dockside and into the bay, a rain of tiny coins that could have made life better for everyone on Berk…

…but he was already leaning forward on Toothless, power-diving as fast as they could, heedless of their own safety as he saw Astrid fall away from Stormfly. He glanced across and saw Ryker grinning, the icy shiver of fear prickling his spine and he felt a jolt through him.

_How will you cope when we return the girl's dead body to you?_

Toothless's wings beat faster, the ground rearing up towards them at a frightening rate-but he flipped the Night Fury round and heard the scream cut off, felt the vague tug on their perfect arc as Toothless snatched her up and spared her from a probably fatal fall-or aftermath. But Stormfly still impacted with a desolate squawk and he heard the desperate cry that echoed his every time he was separated from his best friend.

"STORMFLY!"

Ryker was already running towards the fallen Nadder, his brutal jagged sword in his hand as he moved in for the kill. Hiccup tensed as they flipped round and without a word, Toothless fired at the Grimborn, the impact tossing him back and ripping the dragon-proof net apart before the Night Fury swooped across the arena, seeing Hunters and guests scrabbling for the tiny gold coins that had been scattered. Viggo's gold was gone-but so was the hope for Berk. Emptying his saddle bags, he threw his Monstrous Nightmare gel capsules at the Hunters, seeing them leap back from the sudden inferno of flames that burst from the shattered pots. Viggo was shouting orders as Hiccup threw a Zippleback canister at him with all his might-but he ducked away from the ensuing explosion and screamed orders at his men. The barrage of arrows intensified around Hiccup.

"This isn't over, Viggo!" Hiccup yelled down at him. "I will never stop until you are finished!" Toothless fired once more as Stormfly accelerated up past them and they turned to follow, heading for the retreating Dragon Riders as they headed north across the black, unlit island and out to sea. Stormfly quietly flew beneath Toothless and Astrid was soundlessly dropped back onto her dragon, swooping away with a wary look at the silent Hiccup. It was only when Kaupmadur Island was a silhouette against the starlit horizon that the Chief called a halt, the dragons all hanging in a semi-circle around the Night Fury and the Rumblehorn. Stoick scowled, glaring at his son and Hiccup quietly flipped his mask up, his emerald eyes defensive.

"What was that, son?" he demanded. "And don't tell me it was a usual raid! That was anything but usual! That was a suicide mission!"

Hiccup looked around then, seeing a wall of accusing glances. He took a heavy breath.

"No," he said tonelessly. "A choice. The choice to stop the Hunters…or allow them to continue enslaving dragons, targeting Berk and defeating us."

"Son…there is always a better chance…" Stoick said grimly. But lifting his chin, Hiccup shook his head.

"That was it-and thanks to you…I failed," he said harshly. "My plan would have left only one casualty…well, one Viking…and one Night Fury…"

Every set of eyes widened and Astrid looked across to the Chief. There was a creak as his fists clenched in anger.

"Come back to Berk!" Stoick commanded but Hiccup shook his head.

"No," he said evenly. "I don't belong there any more. I'm sorry, Dad-but I'm going back to the Edge." Stoick forced his voice to be level, even though he was clearly getting furious.

"That wasn't a request, son," he growled. "I am your Chief as well as your father. And that, in case you were in any doubt, was an order. Come back to Berk! Now!"

"I can't," he said through his teeth. "I…"

And then Snotlout swooped. Hookfang surged forward upside down and his rider's fist crashed accurately across Hiccup's face. The auburn-haired Viking sagged in shock as the blow connected…and then collapsed sideways from the saddle, completely limp, his metal foot no longer keeping the control pedal open. Snotlout wrenched the unconscious body from the saddle as Skullcrusher scooped up the Night Fury.

And Stoick couldn't help feeling the dragon looked relieved.


	9. Try

**9: Try:**

Hiccup awoke blearily, lying on his front on his bed, his head aching and cheek feeling swollen from the punch. He hadn't been hit by Snotlout properly since he befriended Toothless and the bullying from his childhood died down-he didn't count his cousin's lame attempts to get him angry while trying to help the twins get Barf and Belch back-and he had forgotten that Snotlout was in fact very strong. He whined slightly and pressed his hand to his cheek, feeling the swelling and he groaned. As his eyes focussed, he recognised the incredibly familiar pattern of grain and knots in the wood: he was back in his bedroom on Berk.

He groaned. He had failed on every level. Sure, he had blown up most of Viggo's ships and freed the dragons, ruining the auction and maybe seriously inconveniencing the Hunters-but they were alive and still in business. And he had sacrificed the gold that could have repaid his debt to Berk to save Astrid. He blinked and abruptly sat up, grimacing as his neck twinged. Grimacing, he cracked his neck, wondering just how he had been lying-and how he had been transported back to Berk. He sighed and slid his legs round, glad to see his prosthesis still in place: if he had been with Viggo or Ryker, they would have taken his leg, making sure he didn't have the option to walk out of the place. Shaking his head, he grasped the edge of the bed and pushed himself upright.

 _You couldn't even manage to pretend to yourself!_ Ryder sneered as Hiccup ran his hand through his hair. He felt horrible-tired, grimy, aching. He knew he hadn't been eating properly and certainly hadn't been taking care of himself. He ran his hands over his face again, feeling the swelling from the punch and enough scruff on his jaw to warrant a shave and then he shook his head.

"Good luck swimming back to your base," he murmured, turning to Toothless. "Okay, bud-we need to go. They won't trust me again after that raid…and I can't talk to Dad. I can't disappoint him. He still thinks he's proud of me. I can't ruin that."

 _He'll find out,_ Ryker reminded him. _He'll realise his precious 'Pride of Berk' is a traitor and a weak, useless boy. He should make you a thrall, not his son!_

"We have to go, bud," Hiccup repeated more urgently, an edge of panic tinging his voice. Being here on Berk, in his room was bringing it all back: being snatched by Amos and Berthel, passed from bounty hunter to bounty hunter, punched and struck by every one, trying so hard to get away-and failing…and ending as Ryker's prisoner, tortured and broken in every possibly way…

Toothless cracked an eye open and stared at him for a long moment-before flicking his tail round to shield his face and pointedly closing his eye again. Hiccup dropped to his knees in front of the dragon and rested his hands on the scaly face.

"Please, bud," he breathed softly. "I can't stay here. I need you. I need your help…"

The Night Fury jerked his head away and Hiccup gave a low groan of pain.

"I know I upset you," he whispered. "I know…I was willing to kill us both…but I had to. Don't you see? I can't be strong on my own. I'm not strong enough to stop Viggo and Ryker without you."

Toothless growled, saying very clearly: ENOUGH.

But Hiccup recoiled as if slapped and all expression fell from his face. Mechanically, he rose, grabbed his sword and scrambled onto the bed.

"Then we're done," he said tonelessly. "Without you, I truly am nothing."

 _So we agree, boy,_ Ryker laughed. _You're a failure in every possible way. You're a traitor to your Tribe and your so-called friends. You're a disappointment to your father. You're even rejected by your dragon. You are weak and nothing. Come to me-or go to Hel._

Toothless lifted his head with a sad croon as the tall, armoured shape scrabbled through the window hatch and scrambled out of sight. He didn't want to leave Berk because he knew that his beloved Rider needed help. The way he continued to talk to his unseen shade; his mood swings; his coldness to his friends and his final, broken words all worried the dragon beyond reason. Because Hiccup hadn't even said goodbye: he had just gone, his whole manner seeming…hopeless.

_I'm never leaving you again._

But he had. And Toothless sensed that maybe, if he did nothing, this was final.

With a huff, the black dragon scrambled to his feet and raced down the stairs to the main door of the house. It didn't take much effort to barge it open and race down the hill, looking for the blonde shape of his almost-and-should-be-in-the-future-mate. After a crucial few minutes of searching, he found her at the stable they had attached to the back of her parents' rebuilt home, fussing Stormfly and feeding her chicken. The Nadder had a wing in a sling, damaged by the fall during the battle and the long flight she had been forced to complete afterwards and her Rider was fussing her to make her feel better. Toothless felt a pang of nostalgia because Hiccup hadn't fussed him so much recently, since he had endured his kidnapping but then he bounded forward, crooning worriedly. The Nadder offered a sympathetic caw as the blonde woman turned to him, her beautiful face creasing in concern.

"Toothless?' she asked softly. The dragon gave a worried warble and she turned to face him directly, leaning forward. "Hiccup?" The dragon nodded. She sighed and rested a hand on his muzzle. "He needs us, doesn't he?" Toothless gave a little coo and she sighed. "Okay," she said. "We need to find him-and we're not leaving him until we get some answers!"

oOo

Toothless insisted Astrid scrambled on his back and they galloped up the hill towards the forest. He could have flown because he knew that Astrid had been taught how to use the prosthetic tail-but he could smell Hiccup's scent and it was easier to follow on the ground. But as they bounded over the fallen logs, the mossy hummocks and the little streams in the dense spruce forest of Raven Point, both woman and dragon knew the only place Hiccup would head. It was the most special place on Berk, the place where he had met his best friend and always gone when he needed space to think and be alone.

But Astrid's heart was pounding as she slid from Toothless's back and peered down into the rocky depression, seeing the tall lean shape in the alien black leather armour, hands running through his tousled auburn hair. He was shaking his head and seemed to be talking to himself. Frowning, she slid down the crevice that acted as entrance to the cove, then landed on the mossy grass. Toothless was more direct, leaping down directly. But Hiccup gave no sign he had seen or heard them. Sharing a worried glance with the Night Fury, she walked closer to him.

"Hiccup?"

The word was gentle, hesitant and met by no response at all. She stared at him, seeing the shape hunched, the aggressive black leather armour making him appear paler and gaunter, the bruise from the punch ugly on his pale cheek. And Toothless's unhappiness, the fact Hiccup had finally broken from his dragon made Astrid afraid for him. Because while he had Toothless, his brother and best friend, he had support, some anchor to everything he was. But now…he looked like a dead man walking. And she knew in her heart and soul that this was her last chance to reach him, to force him to tell her what had so wounded his heart and had forced the goofy, kind, brilliant boy she loved to become the stranger before her. And she wouldn't leave until she had made him talk-by whatever means.

"Hiccup?" she repeated, advancing slowly. "We need to talk."

"Go away," he growled, staring at the ground. The dragon crooned and approached him but Hiccup's stiff posture made even Toothless pause, his eyes wide and unhappy. His beloved brother…no longer loved him. He was no longer the person that Toothless had bonded with.

"No," Astrid told him levelly, seeing his shoulders tense. Suddenly he leapt up, Inferno in his hand, the flaming blade inches from her face.

"Go. Away," he snarled through his teeth. Astrid stared calmly into his blazing green eyes, not even flinching.

"You're not going to do this," she told him calmly.

_Yes I will. Leave me alone and I'll finish it. And then no one will be shamed by talking to or dealing with me again._

"Try me," he hissed. "You've taken everything else!"

And then she really did stare at him, utterly shocked, She backed up a pace at the ferocity in his expression and her gaze betrayed her hurt.

"Just what have I taken from you, Hiccup?" she asked him. He levelled Inferno at her chest.

_My heart. My hope. But I can't tell you that._

"The Riders. My role as leader. My honour. You've made me look weak and…" he growled but she moved astonishingly fast, ducking under the blade, her foot slamming into his middle and then kicking the blade from his hand. He lunged at her but she blocked. Yet he had improved as well, catching her arms and tossing her aside. She landed stumbled and then danced forward, her fists bunched and eyes locked on his face.

"No one made you look weak," she snapped, eyes glittering as she watched his every move. "You almost got them all killed in some Loki-damned insane plan. And for what?" He swiped a punch at her but she dodged, landing a brace on his torso. She knew his leather armour would shield him from the blows but he flinched as she struck him and she almost felt bad-but his face was still twisted with anger and she wouldn't lower her guard.

"You can't understand," he hissed through his teeth. "You would never understand!"

_Let me go. Please._

"Try me!" she invited him, circling him with perfect poise and balance.

 _Tell her,_ Ryker hissed. _See if she wants to help you then, boy! Tell her what you betrayed…_

"You've never faced this," he shouted at her.

"Faced what?" she snapped. He threw himself at her, bearing her to the ground, but she rolled, kicking him off and bouncing to her feet.

"This!" he shouted, arms flung wide. "Being hunted for a bounty! Being so weak and helpless that everyone caught me and traded me off like a Thor-damned chicken!"

 _Don't let Tuff hear you say that,_ Astrid thought insanely as he raged at her.

"So I knew I had to change! I couldn't continue to be so useless and weak that you always had to rescue me! That my plans were so lame that people got hurt! That people got killed!"

"But your plans almost got everyone killed-and they would have, if we hadn't come to your rescue!" Astrid argued, her eyes flashing. "Gods, Hiccup! Did you have idea what you were doing? You have pushed and shouted and been so cold to the team that they don't know what they're doing! They follow you because they like or admire you…or they did. But you've become as cold and cruel and uncaring as Viggo himself. I have seen you attack every Hunter base you could find-and massacre the Hunters when they were beaten." Her eyes expressed her dismay. "You killed them in cold blood, Hiccup."

"Isn't that what a Viking does?" he asked her sarcastically. "But as I'm not a Viking, as no one gives me any credence or any respect as a Viking or a leader, I had to change. I had to become a proper Viking-you know, ruthless, brutal, unyielding…"

"Hiccup…this isn't about being a Viking," she told him urgently. "It's about being Hiccup."

"The runt of the litter, the disappointment son of the great Stoick the Vast, the weak, pathetic boy who has been captured and handed from bounty hunter to bounty hunter!" he snarked. "You think I wanna be him any more?"

"You should!" she shouted in his face. "Because he was the boy who saw what others didn't and befriended a Night Fury, who was prepared to defy his father and risk his life to prove that dragons weren't mindless beasts! He was the boy who risked his life to save the village and defeat the Red Death. He was the boy who fought off Outcasts and Berserkers, who ended the war and forged the Treaty with Alvin. He was the guy who ended the menace of the Screaming Death, who chased the hope of exploration into the Great Beyond, who founded the Edge, who saved each and every one of us. Hiccup was the person who was all our friend, who showed me the truth about dragons, who made us all dragon riders, who became the Pride of Berk and the pride and hope of his father. He was the guy who risked so much to rescue dragons from the Hunters, no matter how dangerous-and who wouldn't put anyone else at risk when he put himself in harm's way instead. And who always came up with a crazy, inventive and bold plan to get us out of trouble. Hiccup always saw the good in everyone-even Snot and the twins-and who made us the force we are. He was kind and generous and caring and inventive and brave. And he was the guy we would fly to the ends of the world for, if he asked or if he needed us-even if we didn't understand why and what he wanted because he was our friend and we trusted him. And Gods, we would fight off every Hunter and bounty hunter on Midgard to protect him and get him back if he was in trouble because we all-in our own ways-loved him."

He stared at her.

"But you stopped being Hiccup and became a twisted version of Viggo. You were cruel to everyone. You pushed us away. You stopped caring for our safety and our worries. You hurt most of us. You…" She stopped. You broke my heart, her eyes said but she wouldn't say the words. "You became someone we didn't like, we didn't respect and wouldn't want to follow because you would spend our lives and our dragons' lives in an instant for your damned revenge on the Grimborns!"

"I…it's not your concern," he told her tightly.

"OF COURSE IT IS!" she shouted in his face. "Because when you became Viggo's twisted reflection, then you truly lost-and I don't think you see it, Hiccup. Your strength was your mind-and your heart. You have courage and you have compassion-and those two things will move mountains! They changed the whole of Hooligan society and ended a war that had raged for three hundred years!"

"Four," he mumbled.

"And you keep going on about being weak and wanting to be strong-but didn't you understand? Our unity and friendship was our strength? No matter what Viggo came up with, we pulled together and as you listened to the crazy ramblings of every one of us, you could pick out what you needed to come up with the solution. And the unpredictability of what we did threw Viggo and often pulled our asses out of the fire when everything looked hopeless. But you've destroyed all of that. No one speaks to you now. The twins probably hate you. Snot…I think he may as well. After the raid, Heather wants to leave. The A Team…well, none of them would follow you to the Great Hall for dinner, let alone on a mission now! You have taken everything that was good and powerful and strong and you've shattered it more effectively than Viggo ever could. Because if you were hurt, we would have rescued you and helped you recover and made it all right-but when you cut us off and were cruel to everyone, why would we want to go an extra inch to help you? When you stopped caring about the dragons and the adventure; when it became all about you and all about revenge, then that's when stopped being our concern. And you broke the Dragon Riders."

"I had to become stronger," he insisted angrily.

"But you became weaker!" she snapped. "You made yourself vulnerable and isolated. You cut off your sources of advice and friendship and support. You made yourself predictable because you're trying to be Viggo-and I have to tell you now: Viggo is much better at that than you ever will be! Why do you think he wanted you dead, Hiccup? You were a huge problem for him-one he couldn't cope with. So he snapped. But even when you were so mutton-headed you didn't listen to me or tell your Dad-who could have come up with the solution to warn them off-we came for you. We scoured the Archipelago and beyond for you and we found you before Viggo could kill you!"

Hiccup looked away, his head bowed. He could hear Ryker's taunts hissing in his ears.

"No," he said quietly. "You were too late."

She stared at him and Toothless gave a small croon.

"Then tell me!" she insisted. "Hiccup!"

"I can't," he said.

"Hiccup-no matter what a total asshole you've become, I still want to help you!" she told him, gently approaching him.

"Which just proves how weak you are," he murmured. "Friends are a weakness, a vulnerability. Even now, you won't listen to what I tell you. You just assume I want to become Hiccup."

"Instead, you've become Ryker!" she shouted and he snapped round, eyes glittering with rage. She knew she'd landed a direct hit.

"Never…" he began but she glared at him.

"You don't like it? But that's exactly who you are!" she retorted, seeing the opening. "You aren't Viggo, because he's still playing you like a puppet. Gods, he must have thought Snoggletog had come when you turned into a bad version of his older brother. You've lost everything that made you a dangerous foe and turned yourself into a soft target. And without us, you would be dead and your dragons-including Toothless here-would be in his hands. Cold, cruel, vicious-you are just an inferior version of Ryker!"

"Go away!" he shouted at her, his voice cracking just a little. "You don't know anything! You have no idea what he did, what I suffered…you just flew in and expected me to be the same. But thanks to Viggo, everyone was after me! Every time I tried to get away, they got me back. And no matter what I tried…I failed. And then finally, I was handed over to Ryker-and he punched me unconscious and I woke on his ship…and I knew you were after me…but as the voyage went on…no one came."

His voice had dropped but his fists clenched and his blazing emerald eyes glared at her.

"And you will never understand what he did."

"Tell me!" she begged softly but he turned away. "Please, Hiccup-I just want to help you."

_I love you._

"Go," he said tonelessly. "Please-just go." She stared at him for a long, hopeless moment and finally turned away, bending down to collect her axe as she walked away. Toothless gave a small, sad warble but Hiccup shook his head, still looking away. Astrid sighed. She truly wanted to punch him, to scream at him, to force him to talk…but Ryker had already forced him and broken him. And if there wasn't a single corner of the man facing her who wanted to accept her reaching out to him, then maybe…he was beyond helping. Maybe she had finally lost Hiccup.

"I tried," she sighed. "I'm sorry, Hiccup. I can't do any more. I want to help you, I truly do…but I can only help you if you want to be helped. I…I want you back." She swallowed. "I miss you," she added softly as she walked towards the crevice that acted as entrance and exit to the cove by foot. Toothless gave a sad croon then turned away, not seeing Hiccup flinched as Ryker's triumphant voice hissed in his ear.

_You're mine. You'll always be mine. And you are nothing._

_She never loved you. And never will now…_

And then she heard it-the soft thud and a shuddering breath. She paused and turned round-to see Hiccup had dropped to his knees, his hands pressed over his face. His shoulders were jerking just slightly, his head bowed. And then he folded forward, curling into a fetal ball and rocking slightly, his back shuddering with silent sobs. Sharing an anxious look with the Night Fury, Astrid raced back to him, her frustration and incomprehension put aside as she dropped to her knees by him.

"Hiccup?' she asked gently, reaching for him but pausing, her hand hovering mere inches from his shuddering shoulder. But he just sobbed harder so she gently clasped his shoulder. And when he raised his face to look at her, his skin was wet with tears, tragic emerald eyes utterly desolate.

"I'm not worth it, Astrid," he whispered. "I can't ever make up for it…"

So she pulled him against her and felt a sudden surge of relief as he leaned against her, his face burrowing into her shoulder and arms wrapping tight around her slim body. Huge tearing sobs shook through him, his face turned away from her but she just held him tight, anxious and hopeful-because this was the closest she had been to him since that first day when they had gotten him back from Ryker.

"Hiccup, whatever happened, I am always here for you, you mutton-head," she whispered into his ear. "Now please, please, tell me what's going on."

When his sobs finally quietened, he gave the slightest of nods and he pulled away from her. Miserably, he sat on the floor, pulling his knees up to his chest, his prosthetic clicking. With a gentle warble, Toothless crept over and sat behind him, nuzzling at the young man and Hiccup raised his wet face, palming at his cheeks. His emerald eyes were shining with misery and guilt.

"I'm so sorry, bud," he sighed, gently stroking the dragon's muzzle. Unhesitatingly, the Night Fury pressed his nose into his palm and Hiccup got to his knees and instantly hugged the dragon, holding the reptile for a long time. "I've not been much of a friend, have I? I put you at risk-and our friends. Hel, I was willing to sacrifice us both to stop them. And I wouldn't listen to you when you didn't want to go on the attack, when you saw those missiles coming." He gave a small, bitter laugh. "I taught the others to listen to their dragons years ago-but I didn't listen to mine. Or to my friends." He shook his head as Toothless solemnly licked his face and the young man gave the slightest of smiles. "Thanks, bud," he murmured and then he turned back to the girl, sitting back down by her, the dragon curled at his back. She gently stretched out her hand and rested it against his bruised cheek, feeling the dampness-and the stickiness from Toothless's saliva.

"Something has happened," she said gently. "Something has gone very wrong with my brave, sarcastic, amazing friend. And things only get better if you share, if you are honest. Gods, I learned that when I tried to keep the fact I was working with Heather when she was undercover with the Hunters from you. That deceit, those lies almost destroyed us, Hiccup. And I never wanted to feel as wretched as I did then-because though I could justify the reasoning, it felt wrong not be honest with you because you are my best friend. And I know something terrible must have happened to do this. You kept escaping from the bounty hunters all the way through, you never gave up…until the end. Why?"

He closed his eyes, pressing into her hand before he lifted a hand to grasp it gently, holding it tenderly in his larger grasp.

"Ryker," he murmured very quietly. "When he had me, there was no plan, no need for me to be alive or unharmed. I wasn't a bargaining chip or an enemy to be gloated over: I was being taken to die, I was of no more consequence. And I was so battered and bruised, my neck was agony and my metal leg was missing. And as long as I didn't die, I was his." He bowed his head and blinked hard. She grasped the hand in her other and brought it to her mouth, ghosting a gentle kiss on his skin.

"Hiccup, I can't imagine how hard that was," she said gently, "though I saw the scars…" His mouth twisted in a sardonic smile.

"Some of them," he told her grimly. "I have a lot more. As soon as I was in his hands, he tortured me for my knowledge of the Edge's and Berk's defences. And he was very, very direct because he only had until he arrived back at base to get anything out of me." Her eyes shone in sympathy and her grip tightened on his hand.

"I am here," she reassured him. She could feel him trembling but he forced himself to smile again.

"Yeah, and I was glad you weren't there then," he admitted. "Because it was…terrible. I-I just recall pain and my screams. And-and he kept taunting me that there was no one to come, that I was out of time, that you had all abandoned me because I was too weak and useless, that I was only useful for one thing, that my corpse would be sent back to Dad as a warning…"

"And…?"

"And I told him my father would hunt him down like the dog he was," Hiccup admitted. "Um…not one of my snappiest come-backs, but my throat was really sore and I was barely conscious from the torture and…um everything else…" He swallowed. "Um, I may have called him a son of a deformed Gronckle as well." She managed a small smile.

"Gods, you were really off your game," she teased him and the smile fell from his face, his eyes dropping.

"So you see why there's no hope," he whispered, his head bowing.

_None of your friends will want a traitor, a coward, a pathetic ruined boy like you. Come back to me, Hiccup Haddock. You're mine. There's nothing left for you here._

"I'm sorry, Astrid…"

"Hiccup, I know you did nothing wrong," she told him, grasping his face between her hands. "Is this why you were so obsessed with revenge? To avenge your hurts? What Ryker did to you?"

He gave a short bitter laugh.

_Tell her. And watch her spurn you._

"Revenge is all that he left," he mouthed gruffly. "He…he…" And then he closed his eyes. "He took everything else from me. I'm sorry, Astrid. I'm so, so sorry…"

"Hiccup?" she asked, a sick feeling in her stomach. He wrapped his arms around his body and his shoulders hunched.

"You can't have anything to do with me now," he breathed. "Astrid…" But she flung her arms around him and hugged him tight, feeling him shaking. "I could have coped-just-with everyone being after me and being battered and bruised and handed around like a commodity…but when he…when Ryker…I knew I was too weak. I couldn't stop anything. I had to change-Thor, I had to become stronger. I had to push everyone away so I wouldn't be vulnerable because I was worried about them-but that didn't work. I had to push you away because you would never give up and would find out what he had done. Because when it all went wrong, you wouldn't be there to distract me. Because when it all went wrong, you would be safe. You would survive." Her eyes widened in shock and sympathy and he closed his eyes as she squeezed him tighter. "I needed to be able to attack them, to finish it without worrying about you. But I was a failure at that as well!" She sighed into his neck, feeling him hug her back.

"Hiccup-you were a failure at being a ruthless, heartless, cruel, evil warlord," she told him. "Not actually something anyone should aspire to anyway. You could have finished them-but you chose to save my life instead, to give up the gold to save a life, not end two." She took a deep breath, nuzzling against his neck briefly, before pulling back and staring into his ashamed face. "You are exceptional and amazing at being my friend, Hiccup. I wish I had him back-because then I could tell him that I don't care what Ryker did to torture him, what abuses he put him through because no one else will ever know. And I am his friend and will stand by and protect him until Ragnarok." He looked into her face, seeing tears on her face as well and her utter determination.

"Astrid," he mumbled.

"Hiccup-stop being a mutton-head, okay?" she told him in a mildly exasperated voice. "You're my best friend, my future Chief, the first person I flew with and probably-hopefully-the last person I will end up flying with. I can't imagine a world without you, Hiccup. What happened doesn't matter as long as you are you. Be my Hiccup again."

"Um…your Hiccup?" he asked shakily as she grabbed him, hauling him forward and pressing a brief but determined kiss on his lips. She pulled back with a smile, seeing his emerald eyes widen with utter shock.

"That's for telling me, for trusting me," she told him and then punched him really hard on the arm, managing to find a gap in his armour.

"OWWW!" he yelped.

"And that's for everything else," she told him smugly. "Stop being…all of this and become my friend once more." She paused. "And lose the stupid armour, Hiccup!" He sighed heavily.

"It's not that comfortable," he admitted. "I think the tunic needs to be more flexible and the arm and leg guards aren't that helpful-but I do like the binders…" He rotated his arms and looked at the vambraces. "Maybe with a knife and a compass…"

"I really liked your old armour," she told him as he began to unstrap the black leather. He offered her a shy smile.

"Little help here?" he asked and she willingly helped him out of the armour, the pieces falling to the floor of the cove. He unfastened the gorget and stared at it for a long moment.

"I could understand that," she admitted and he gave a wan smile as he dropped it to the floor.

"It always felt like something was tight around my neck," he admitted. "I thought I'd feel safer but instead, I felt…imprisoned, not free." She rose and offered him her hand, helping him rise, once again a tall lean shape in red tunic and dull green leggings, his shining green eyes apologetic and auburn hair casually messy. They grabbed their weapons.

"Let's go back to the village-and start building bridges," she said as he grasped her hand gently.

"I have a lot of construction work to do," he murmured and then sighed. "I am sorry, Astrid. I can't even manage to be a ruthless murderer properly." He stared at the ground with a sigh and covered his face with his other hand. "Gods…how can you ever forgive me?" She sighed, her fingers lacing with his.

"You were right about one thing," she admitted. "You are a Viking. And they were trying to kill us. Viggo tried to kill you. They've tried to kill us many times. And while your response would make Madguts the Murderous or Dagur the Deranged proud, it wasn't completely unViking. It was just unHiccup."

"Is that a word?" he asked her dryly and she swatted his shoulder instantly. He flinched, used to Astrid's usual means of communication.

"Of course, mutton-head," she scolded him and he sighed. "In fact, the fact you have hardly ever killed anyone is more unusual than anything else, Hiccup."

"I am going to have nightmares about those raids…those deaths…for a long time," he admitted. "Um along with everything else." She squeezed his hand.

"And I'll be there to help you through-if you'll let me," she told him. He nodded as a small roar sounded. "And Toothless-no, I hadn't forgotten you!" she added as the dragon gave a smug warble.

"Would you like a lift back to the village, Milady?" he asked, gesturing to Toothless, who grinned edentulously and waggled his butt like an over-excited puppy now that his little Viking seems to be back to his usual self and once again friends with his almost-and-should-be-in-the-future-mate. She smirked and squeezed his hand back.

"I thought you'd never ask."


	10. Full Time

**10: Full Time**

Arms wrapped around his lean shape, Astrid found herself bathing in Hiccup's warmth and feeling the shift of his muscles as he flew Toothless. They weren't going straight back to the village but the long way round, because Hiccup knew he owed Toothless a proper flight-and Astrid a longer explanation.

"I missed you," he said honestly, leaning slightly as Toothless banked then soared up above the island. The dragon gave a happy warble and the young man smiled, his hand tenderly stroking the top of the dragon's head, feeling the vibration of the warble. "Yeah, you too, bud," he added in an amused voice. "Even though you never really left my side…" Astrid's lips stretched in a smile at the familiar dialogue-even though one of the participants couldn't speak.

"I missed my best friend," she reminded him. He paused and his head bowed.

"I-I can't explain how…awful I felt in pushing you away," he explained, his voice a little shaky. "But when I was going through the whole being hunted ordeal, I kept getting away and everyone but everyone was stronger and better than me and they all recaptured me. And I just wasn't good enough, wasn't strong enough to get away. And when…" His breathing hitched. "When Ryker had me dragged into his office, he told me that you weren't coming, that it was too late. That Viggo was going to plunge the sword into my heart himself when we got back to their base…and nothing I could do would stop it. And then he…"

"Hiccup-you don't have to…" she reassured him, laying her head against his shoulder. Her arms tightened slightly around him because she could feel him shake.

"He tortured me. He abused me. He cut me. And throughout it all, he kept talking, Astrid! Everything he did, he told me was my own fault because I was too weak, because I was worthless. That I was a traitor and I was his. And that my only place was with them because you hadn't come for me so you didn't want me. And as he tortured me, as I screamed and tried my hardest to resist, all I could hear was his voice, sneering that after all I had done, I was nothing. And I was going to die, alone and unmourned and my dead body would be pitched into the sea. No one would ever find out what happened."

"Hiccup…"

"And I can still hear him," he said brokenly. "I could hear him whispering filth and sneering and telling me that he would send bounty hunters after you and Dad, that he would ravage you and kill you and send you back to me dead. That he would kill our dragons and keep me as his slave. That he would…he would…and I knew I had to stop him. I had to work, I had to become better with the sword, I had to plan and attack and undermine everything they had and stop them. And you were right, I had to take revenge on Ryder what everything…but no matter what I did, nothing silenced him. Because I knew he had broken me, had snapped my spirit."

"It's okay," she whispered. He shook his head and his shoulders were jerking now.

"When…he raped me, I told him everything about the defences on the Edge," he whispered. "Not Berk. Never Berk. And I-I had to try to stop him because it was just…shattering…but he…didn't…" She gently reached up and stroked her hand through his hair. His breath was coming in shuddering sobs and she realised this wasn't a hurt he had shared with anyone. Nor could he. Hiccup was a brave, determined, stubborn young man but he was just one lone Viking-and Ryker's actions had been calculated to brutally dominate and degrade his prisoner as a prelude to his death. Neither Grimborn intended for Hiccup to live and both wanted to destroy him as cruelly and swiftly as they could. Ryder's 'very direct' means had done immeasurable damage to her friend, both physically and psychologically. But also socially. If this got out…he was done. They both knew it and his violent quest for vengeance was his only possible response to the man who had taken everything from him, short of his life. Heart bursting with pity and sorrow, she stroked his soft, tousled hair again. As she repeated the action, he sighed and pressed against her gentle touch.

"You cut out the braids," she said softly. That had worried her when she had noted it because she had braided his hair-just a couple of tiny braids behind the right ear. It had been a joke and he had whined and moaned but had always kept them and she had diligently rebraided his hair when they began to grow out or got scruffy. He nodded.

"Didn't deserve them," he admitted. "They showed I was a member of the Tribe, a Viking. That I belonged to _you_. But I really was nothing. No one. So I removed them." He gave a shuddering sigh. "I had to cut all ties with you-because I had to be ruthless and brutal and cruel-just like them. Because I couldn't let them imagine you meant anything to me. Because I had to hurt them. And it wasn't me. And every time, as I cut away more and more pieces of my life, Ryker's voice got louder and louder about how worthless and weak I was. About how much you despised and hated me. About how you wanted to leave me to die."

"Because you silenced your friends, cut away the support from the people who cared for you and just left your doubts and insecurities to pick at you," she told him gently. "That was what Ryker was-every insecurity and uncertainty you ever had, rolled into one brutal package that haunted your nightmares."

"Except I'm pretty sure I was awake when I heard him," he pointed out quietly, feeling Toothless croon worriedly. "Yeah, I know, bud. You heard me talking to him. You looked pretty worried sometimes." She stroked his hair again before wrapping her arm around his chest once more.

"Hiccup, you suffered a horrible trauma," she realised. "Being hunted, abused, hauled around, handed over like commodity, taken to be murdered-that would be enough to freak anyone out-even someone as stubborn as you. And though you are very brave, you had to be scared-especially when you ended in Ryker's hands and it all seemed hopeless. And when he started hurting you with no hope of rescue…Gods, I wouldn't have coped."

"You saw me when you came," he sighed. "I-I thought you were a vision, a hallucination caused by the pain…but when you touched my face, when you freed me…I allowed myself to hope…and then the knife hit me and I knew…I knew I was going to die…and I never got to tell you…" He stopped, his voice fading to a whisper.

Toothless banked and Hiccup's foot moved without any conscious thought, landing them above the Chief's House, right at the top of the village. He unclipped his metal foot from the pedal as Astrid slid from the Night Fury's back and waited for him to come to face her. And as he stood, she saw the pallor in his face, the redness of his eyes and the dampness on his faintly-freckled and bruised cheeks. She stared up into his shining emerald eyes, her fingers softly threading through his hair as she stroked his cheek.

"Tell me," she urged him gently. He swallowed and she could feel the surge of warmth under her hand as he blushed. He shook his head.

"It doesn't matter any more," he told her softly. "There's no hope."

"Tell me anyway…" she asked him. He nodded extremely self-consciously.

"Um…I sort of thought and maybe hoped you knew already though Gobber had already told me-um, _lots_ of times, by the way-that people need to hear it said," he rambled, his emerald eyes wide with anxiety. "I love you, Astrid. I have for ever. And I know you can't really want anything to do with me and I get that with the way I behaved and what happened and everything but if we could at least be friends again, I may just maybe get over this-but not over you-possibly by the time I'm eighty…" She gave a small, indulgent smile.

"Hiccup, you mutton-headed lunatic," she scolded him gently. "Of course I love you." His eyes widened and he stared at her, his mouth working soundlessly for a moment.

"Um-you do?" he managed to get out after a few seconds. She nodded.

"Why do you think I wouldn't give up on you-even when you were behaving like the biggest ass this side of the Hunter's base camp?" she asked him dryly. "Remember-you're not weak-because you have the smartest brain and the biggest heart and the craziest friends in Midgard!" He nodded and swallowed. Then she gave a small smile and grasped his tunic, pulling him towards her. "And the fiercest girlfriend," she added in a whisper. He gave an astonished smile, his expression almost disbelieving that he was hearing the words. But her azure eyes were half-lidded, staring up at him with expectation and desire so he leaned forward and with a silent prayer to Thor, he pressed his lips on hers in a soft and very sweet kiss. It only lasted a few moments, but when he pulled back, there was a smile on her lips.

"You know-that's the first time you've ever kissed me? What took you so long?" she asked him breathlessly, leaning close to him and staring up into his flushed face.

"Um…I wanted it to be perfect," he admitted ashamedly. "And after everything…I knew it never could be…" _And I don't deserve you. I probably never will. Especially after everything._ She rested her head against his shoulder and he very cautiously wrapped an arm around her.

"Life often isn't perfect," she reminded him. "But it is precious and sometimes far too short. We almost lost you to those bounty hunters-and to the Grimborns afterwards. If you wait for perfection, you may miss your chance, mutton-head. But being here, with you, in our home village and with our dragons…it's pretty much as perfect as we could get." She lifted her head and stretched up on her toes, kissing him again and this time, he kissed her back with a little more confidence. As she pulled back, he was smiling.

"Being with you anywhere is perfect," he admitted, their faces inches apart. "I…"

"HEY!"

"And that happened," he sighed as he heard steps approach. Taking a deep breath, he pulled his shoulders back and turned to face the others, who had seen them land. Hiccup faced five very unfriendly faces, a variety of scowls and narrowed eyes as he swallowed and self-consciously rubbed the back of his neck. The bruising on his cheek throbbed from Snotlout's punch as he faced his cousin.

"Um…hey…" he managed quietly. Astrid walked to stand at his side, folded her arms and stared at the others. Snotlout ignored her and lurched forward, jabbing Hiccup hard in the chest with his finger. The taller young man flinched, backing up a pace.

"You! You've got a nerve, turning up here!" he snarled, jabbing. Hiccup grimaced.

"Ow! I do actually live here, Snot!" he protested. "But I'd like to explain. To you all!" His eyes lifted and appealed to his friends and though the twins scowled, Heather and Fishlegs reluctantly nodded. Snotlout glared into the pale face and pulled back a pace, his arms folded.

"This had better be good, cuz," he growled and Hiccup took a deep breath. This was even worse than when he had concealed Dagur from the gang, the shame he had felt at lying to them, at betraying their trust paling into insignificance against what he had done. "Because we tried to help you and you promised to be honest with us. But we almost died!" Guilt wracked him as he took a shuddering breath.

"I'm sorry," he said softly. "I…er…"

The others looked at him with a variety of exasperated looks.

"You gotta do better than that!" Ruff said snarkily. He nodded.

"Um…yeah, got that," he sighed. "Okay-I was complete mutton-head."

"No arguments here," Fishlegs commented coolly. Hiccup nodded.

"But…"

"Here it comes-the lame excuse…" Tuff whispered so loudly everyone heard. Hiccup's head bowed and he stopped…until Astrid gently moved closer to him, a hand gently drifting down to rest against his, fingers very tentatively touching against his. He lifted his eyes slightly and managed a very wan smile. Ruff elbowed her twin in the side and he yelped but his eyes widened as well as he saw the little gesture of affection. Snotlout, of course, missed it.

"Any time today!" he said sarcastically.

"I-I just couldn't cope with what happened," Hiccup said quietly. "Being snatched from the centre of the village itself where I should feel completely safe, bundled up like a package, passed from pillar to post. I tried to escape-Thor knows, I tried…but every time, I was captured and dragged back. Every time I was hit and tied up again. And every time, my best efforts just weren't good enough. And I got more and more desperate until…until I had to kill one of the bounty hunters…"

There was silence and Astrid's fingers twined with his. His voice betrayed his deep shame at the act.

"The masked viking. We were hanging off a cliff…well, I was and he was hanging onto my metal leg. My hand was slipping…so I untied my leg and kicked it off. He fell." He paused. "Of course, that didn't work anyway because I was hauled up by Ryker and punched unconscious." He sighed.

"I don't think you killed him," Heather pointed out. "We found your prosthetic on the top of the cliff when we got to Sleipnir Island. He must have survived and climbed up."

Hiccup gave a humourless laugh.

"Gods, I've been beating myself up and I couldn't even kill him! So I've been torturing myself over that for nothing," he said bitterly. "Though I made the decision which is just as bad…" _And because I'd killed once, every time after hadn't seemed so bad…until now. Gods. I don't even know who I killed first… Probably just some poor guy who was doing his job and expected to go back to his family after his duty was done…_

"It was his life or both of yours," Snotlout said unexpectedly. "It was the only thing you could've done…"

"But I ended up with Ryker," he said tonelessly. Astrid could feel the faint tremble through his hand and knew he was only holding up as well as he was because she was with him. He had dropped the facade he had erected as protection and had shed his armour: he was literally unprotected, totally vulnerable and facing his fears. "And…and he tortured me." He took a shuddering breath and the others realised the simple word didn't do justice to what their friend had suffered-they had all seen the state of him when they got him back. "I-I couldn't hold out. I told him about the defences of the Edge…" And he closed his eyes, his head bowed, expecting a tsunami of criticism and accusations. But what he wasn't expecting was a gentle hand handing on his shoulder.

"He's an evil, sardistic son of a troll," Snotlout said gravely, his eyes fixated on the ashamed face of his cousin. "Gods, if you couldn't hold out, what hope would any of us had? You're the stubbornest, most boar-headed, obstinate, headstrong, awkward, uncooperative, sarcastic person any of us know!"

"That's a lot of words for stubborn," Tuff whispered loudly.

"We're Vikings," Fishlegs reminded him. "We have stubbornness issues. Stubborn practically defines us."

"And Ryker is the most sadistic person in the Hunters," Heather sighed. "Viggo is the brains-but Ryker is the brawn. And he enjoys inflicting suffering." Hiccup nodded.

"And…I couldn't cope with everything. He told me I was so weak, so hopeless. So I-I couldn't own up to what I had done. I had to change myself, to make up, to become stronger…" Astrid shook her head.

"If we just needed muscle, we'd send for Snotlout," she reminded him clearly.

"You said it, babe!" the jet-haired teen said, flexing his biceps with a smug grin. Astrid rolled her eyes in a long-suffering manner and continued.

"Brute strength was never the answer to defeating them-because they will always outnumber us. Your strength was always your brain and your heart and your will. And your friends. Viggo feared us-and he targeted you as our leader because he needed you gone and assumed we would then give up. But we won't. What Ryker achieved was worse: breaking us apart, breaking our friendships and our togetherness. Being cold and cruel and critical would never work. We needed your understanding and compassion, your strength and determination to keep us together. We aren't an army, we're a band of dragon-riding Vikings. And that is unique."

"We're crazy and reckless," Ruff said proudly.

"Definitely crazy," Tuff added. "But for us, crazy works."

"We work as a team but can do our own thing when necessary," Heather added.

"We care about our dragons and each other-which means we will go further than they would expect to protect each other and our dragons," Fishlegs added.

"We're awesomely powerful and know how to use it," Snotlout nodded, kissing his biceps in turn. Astrid swallowed pointedly, looking mildly nauseated.

"And as a team, we have a clever, inventive, brave leader who can snatch plans out of nothing to save the day-or stop the Hunters," she told him. "We need Hiccup, not…whatever you were trying to become." Hiccup sighed.

"Hiccup's broken," he said very quietly.

"But he can be fixed," Ruff said unexpectedly. "You have helped every single one of us. Let us help you-just this once."

"H-what you did wasn't cool and you put me and my unawesome sister at risk-along with our considerably more awesome dragon," Tuff said. "But Thorstons are completely expert at messing up so you have every right to manage a huge mess once in a while-as long as you let us help you clear it up. Though if you ever mention this again or think this means we like clearing up, I will get Barf and Belch to fill your hut up with fish again!"

"Thanks, Tuff," Hiccup said wryly. "It took two weeks to stop the place stinking of…well, plaice."

"The point is that we aren't just a group of people, living on an outpost in the middle of the sea," Fishlegs said. "We're a family. And when you refused to share what was hurting you, when you changed into someone we couldn't like or trust or even understand, you broke that apart. But families stick together, no matter what. And though we're all quite rightfully angry-and we will find some things to do to make it up to us-we will forgive you, Hiccup. We all have our dragons, our lives and each other because of you. We'll help you get through this-together! But please don't ever keep something this big from us. If you are in trouble, if you feel you aren't strong enough, we are your strength, we're your armour, we're your shield."

"We are with you, no matter what," Heather confirmed.

"I-I don't know what to say…" Hiccup said softly.

"Sorry again might be okay," Snotlout suggested snarkily.

"And then thanks," Tuff added. Slowly, the auburn-haired rider lifted his head, his emerald eyes shining with gratitude and relief.

"Um…both of those. I really am so sorry that I've been a complete mutton-head and behaved so badly," he sighed. "I shouldn't have put you at risk. I should have told you what was going on. I shouldn't have withdrawn and been so-so horrible and cruel to you all. And we should have decided together what we were doing to stop the Hunters. And I cannot tell you how grateful I am that you are giving me another chance…"

"GROUP HUG!" Tuff shouted and leapt on Hiccup, knocking him to the ground. Ruff followed instantly, followed by Snotlout. Fishlegs and Heather shared a small smile-then launched themselves onto the pile of teens, leading to a pained grunt from Hiccup, who was at the bottom.

"Argh! Need…air…" he groaned. Astrid beckoned to the Night Fury as she wriggled in to wrap an arm around her new-and probably still secret-boyfriend in the maul the teens had produced. And even under the press of bodies, she felt his hand move and curl tenderly around hers. Toothless gave a small warble and wrapped his wings around the whole pile of riders.

"Now can everyone get off of me?" Hiccup said from the bottom of the pile after a minute. "I can't feel my good leg any more…"

"Tyrant…"

oOo

"Keep still!"

"Ow!" Hiccup tried to jerk away but Astrid was ruthless, her deft fingers tugging on the auburn hair and winding the soft locks into a small braid. He grimaced but remained still as she kicked his good leg. Then she found another hank of hair and swiftly completed the second braid. He gave a sigh of relief when she had finished. "Better, Milady?" he checked with a wry smile. She tilted her head and inspected him, then nodded.

"Definitely," she said firmly. "You finally look like Hiccup once more." He stood, self-consciously fiddling with the new braids and staring into her beautiful face. He had handed her his old braids when they finally got back to his house and to his astonishment, she had kept them, smiling that they were hers anyway-like their owner. With Gobber's help, he had repaired and improved his old leather armour, the fine Gronckle-iron reinforcements from his new armour removed and saved because he was sure he could find something to do with them-maybe in his Dragonfly 7. There was still a sword strapped to his hip, for Astrid had insisted on practising with him every day because she didn't want him to feel vulnerable again. He was already a good swordsman, but she could help him with his agility and with the problem she faced that none of his tutors did: being the smaller and slighter warrior against a much stronger opponent. And he had worked hard in the few days he had been back on Berk. The others had fought him as well, determined to help convince him that he was strong and capable and they had largely succeeded-even though the twins had gotten distracted and started fighting each other rather than Hiccup. His green eyes stared thoughtfully into hers.

"And that's a good thing?" he checked, his tone uncertain. Gently, she took his hand. He was still prone to brooding and tended to go quiet and mull over the tortures he had suffered and the shame that wracked him over his weakness, his subsequent change in behaviour and the deaths he had caused…and committed-but the moment she saw him start to withdraw, she headed for his side and made sure he knew he wasn't alone.

"I'm glad to have you back," she assured him. "I can't imagine a world without Hiccup. I can't imagine my life without you in it." He turned to completely face her, his hands dropping to rest lightly on her waist.

"And I can't imagine a world without you," he murmured gently into her ear. "Now that would be a living nightmare." He leaned forward and kissed her gently, her other hand rising to rest tenderly on his cheek. "And I've already tried it once-never again. There should always be a Hiccup and Astrid."

"Ready?" Fishlegs shouted and the two teens pulled apart swiftly, both blushing. They hadn't officially told their friends they were a couple and were still debating how to broach the subject. And mainly how to try to put it to Snotlout and the twins.

"COMING!" Astrid shouted as they scooted down the stairs in the Chief's House and out onto the green in front, seeing the loaded dragons, the Riders and his father and Gobber waiting. Stoick's eyes alighted on his son and he smiled widely. Hiccup had sat down with him-once he had gotten all the Riders off him-and had the conversation with the Chief that he should have had a month or so earlier. And the Chief had listened silently as his son had told him everything, admitted everything he had suffered and feared and thought and done. And then he had sat quietly, his head bowed, expecting to be disowned. But Stoick had just hugged him and gently scolded him for not telling his father, who loved him dearly, that he was in such distress.

"You are my son, Hiccup," Stoick said in a sad voice. "I am proud of you, no matter what those animals did to you. You fought all the way until you could fight no more. Astrid was right. You aren't me. I am a ferocious warrior. I can crush rocks. I can scare a dragon off with a glare. But only you could tame that dragon and get him to take you home of his own free will. You are Hiccup-and your weapons are brains and heart and will and leadership. You forgot that. But I am always here for you. I will do whatever it takes to protect you, son-no matter the cost. Don't try to be me or Ryker or Viggo. Be Hiccup. Be the son I am so proud of."

"Ready, son?" the Chief asked him and he nodded.

"As I ever will be," he admitted.

"Nervous?"

"As Hel," he added softly. A big hand landed heavily on his shoulder.

"You are never alone," the Chief reassured him. "Toothless, Astrid and the rest will always be there for you. And I'm only a quick dragon ride away."

"A quick day-long ride away," Hiccup muttered dryly.

"That's the Hiccup we know," Gobber commented. "C'mere, laddie!" He threw a huge hug around the lad, then handed him his Inferno-in a new sheath designed to be strapped to his right thigh. Hiccup smiled and nodded as Stoick also hugged him.

"Take care, son-and if you are having any problems…" There was a warning in his voice. Hiccup rolled his emerald eyes.

"I know. Tell you," he sighed.

"Damned right," the Chief growled and slapped him on the back, almost knocking him over. Hiccup winced.

"Thanks, Dad," he grumbled as he clambered onto Toothless. "Feeling the love. Really. Probably all the way back to the Edge…and for the next few days as well…" Astrid glanced down from Stormfly.

"Ready?" she asked and he smiled.

"Always, Milady," he said then leaned forward. "Okay, bud-let's fly!"

The journey hadn't seemed as long this time, surrounded by his friends, riding his best friend with his new girlfriend flying steadily at his side. Everyone was back in their usual place. Everyone was back to normal.

 _You'll never be normal,_ Ryker sneered. _You're weak and worthless and broken. And one day, you will die at our hands…_

I'm normal for me, Hiccup replied silently, feeling the powerful beat of Toothless's wings through his body. The feel of his dragon beneath him, the sounds of the twins arguing and Snotlout snoring and the snuffle of Meatlug all reassured him that he wasn't alone. My strength is my friends and my family and my dragon-brother. They reckon I am worth enough to risk everything for. And they have and will do again. And yes, I am broken…but I can be fixed if I want. And I do. You've lost. Because I am still me-and we will beat you. Not by your way-but by ours. By mine. Protecting dragons and exploring and offering friendship and assistance where it is needed. We are Dragon Riders of Berk and of the Edge. And we will never give up.

And finally…Ryker had no reply.

Suddenly, they broke through the cloud layer and the Edge appeared below them, green and familiar and welcoming. Astrid looked across: his eyes were unfocussed and she knew he was having one of his weird-and increasingly infrequent-silent conversations with 'Ryker'. She waved.

"Hey!" she shouted and he blinked, looking over to her, his face crinkling in a smile, his emerald eyes shining with delight at seeing her smile at him. "You okay?" He nodded.

"I'm more than okay!" he shouted back as they began to descend down towards the stables. "I'm home."

**The End.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made decision early on to have Hiccup change-but underneath, he was still Hiccup, trying to alter himself to cope with his ordeal and what he thought he needed to stop it happening again. Of course, he was completely wrong but if he'd got it right, there wouldn't have been much of a story. I also decided that he deliberately drove Astrid away because he knew it would be safer for her with what 'Ryker' was saying to him. But when it came to the crunch, he gave up his redemption-returning Berk's gold and killing the Grimborns-to save Astrid and Stormfly. Underneath he was still Hiccup: broken and battered but still the same person when it came to the ultimate choice. And he realised-fortunately not too late-that he would still rather give up his own life than lose one of his friends.
> 
> I also decided that there needed to be Hiccstrid. After all that trauma, angst, disaster and mistrust, the only thing powerful enough to balance it would be the declaration that took them almost four series to get to! I felt it was worth stating here-because Hiccup needs his Astrid to get him through and help him recover from this. After all, he's already told her he can't imagine a world without her-and it seemed that was a pretty clear declaration that he loved her anyway. And Astrid would never give up on him. She's stubborn as a rock! Of course, things are likely to be different when they get back onto the Edge-but the gang seem to have forgiven him. Whether they trust him completely is a different matter and may take some time…
> 
> See you soon-harrypanther


End file.
